Ahhhhh

Let me preface this by saying I'm an idiot! It's 3:45 in the morning and I am doing this. Why? Because I like to finish things (even things that aren't as important as getting some sleep). First my dumb computer's sound quit working so I had to fix that. Then I just couldn't relax until my blog was more me. The pink and black was cute, but it just wasn't me. I'm a bright green. Plus I started cracking up at myself (you tend to do that more this late at night) at my silly quote from before. It said "I live in the quiet, joyjous expectation of good." It sounds so nice doesn't it? So serene, so calm. Too bad it's just not the truth. I wish it were, but I'm just so pessimistic! It's like my little self-protection thing. I want to be ready just in case God wants me to go through bad things to teach me to have faith. When really I'm not having faith at all; I'm just worrying too much about things that problably won't ever happen. I am getting much better. God and I have been working on my pessimist problem and I am hoping to someday turn into the eternal optimist. Being married to one helps! Anyway, I hope the yellow isn't too distracting, but it makes me happy!

Ok I'm going to bed. This is just ridiculous. Night night.