One aspect of my personality that I hadn't realized until recently is that I don't like to dwell on things that aren't...happy. One of my spiritual gifts is mercy, so that probably doesn't make much sense, but maybe I can explain a little better. When something terrible happens to those I love, strangers, animals (even a deer crossing the street), it hurts me very deeply. I often have a difficult time separating myself from them in that moment. I'm there with you. If you're hurting--I'm hurting. When it comes to horrible tragedies like that horrible tsunami, hurricane Katrina and now Haiti, sometimes it's easier (ok not sometimes...all the time) to just not think about it. As a mom of two little ones it's heartwrenching to think of spending several nights roaming the streets looking for your kids (or to imagine your kids roaming the streets looking for you). So I've basically ignored the news articles and the pictures and the statistics and lived in my safe bubble of grocery shopping, playdates and activities. Anytime I've heard of people donating money I feel a brief sense of relief that people are being helped, but then I go back to my day emotionally unscathed.
Until today, when I let myself go there; let myself feel the pain of the mothers who have lost children, children who have lost parents, people who would give anything for something to drink or eat.
I know God gave me the gift of mercy for a reason, and it's not to feel sad all the time: to be some kind of pathetic martyr roaming around in sackcloth and ashes. He made me this way so I'd PRAY. and help. and care. and love. And quit thinking about me me me me me me me me day in and day out.
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.
1 Corinthians 1:3-4
Anyway, I know this isn't my usual silly kind of posting, friends; it's just what's been on my heart. Thanks for listening. I hope you know that I'm here to walk any road with you. I hope you know that even if we don't talk for weeks on end, even if we haven't seen each other in ten years, that I think about you. And care.
Love,
Marie
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Haiti
at 2:56 PM
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5 comments:
I love your heart and vulnerability in sharing about this. It is especially heartbreaking to think about the tragedy through the heart of a mother or child.
Thanks, Marie. Your thoughts have made me stop and think about this heart wrenching situation. I love the intensity that comes across in your message. Very moving when you look at it as a mom....
Love you!
I think your sensitive heart is a beautiful gift from God. It is hard to think of the pain that so many must be feeling down there right now. We will just have to continue to cover them with prayer! Love you!
I can really relate to what you shared. It was a great reminder of how to live and love...
We have to look. We must. Because then we will care enough to do something...pray...send money...something. Someone recently said to me, "we should take care of the hurting in America." Well...duh. The fact that we have poor in America doesn't change the fact that Haiti is devastated. They need us, need the rest of the world, to rise up and help.
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