Blessed Imperfection

Homemade Sloppy Joes

2011-11-10T07:00:00.000-08:00

I love Sloppy Joes, but Devin and I came to a pass when we got married because he grew up with the McCormick seasoning packet and I grew up with Manwich. For years we've been using the seasoning packet and a can of undrained diced tomatoes with green chilis. It's really yummy that way, but the other day I couldn't for the life of me track down where the seasoning packets were at Price Chopper, and I was tired of relying on a stupid seasoning packet when I had a cupboard full of spices. I found a great recipe on allrecipes.com

The original one can be found here, but I tweaked it a little:

1 lb ground beef
1/4 cup chopped onion (I used red but I can't see that it matters)
1/4 cup green bell pepper (I used yellow because that's all we had)
can petite cut diced tomatoes (drained. You could use less ketchup/tomato sauce below if you leave them undrained)
1/2 tsp garlic powder
1 teaspoon dry mustard
1 cup ketchup (or you could use plain tomato sauce, but you may want to add a little more sugar and I'd start with 3/4 cup instead of a full cup in case it's runnier)
3 teaspoons brown sugar
1/2 tsp chili powder (add more if you'd like a little more zip. I did)
1/3 tsp cayenne pepper (if you don't have kids that complain about things being too spicy all the time. I do have kids like that, so no cayenne pepper for us. Wimps.)
salt to taste
ground black pepper to taste

In a medium skillet over medium heat, brown the beef, onion, and green pepper. Drain off liquids. Add tomatoes.

Add everything else and mix thoroughly. Reduce heat and simmer. The recipe says for 30 minutes, but we only let it simmer for 7 minutes and it was perfectly yummy.

I like to serve them over sandwich thins, but it's sloppy joes, not rocket science. You can figure out which kind of bun you all like best. :)

Words I thought I'd never say: I love my van

2011-09-06T16:34:00.000-07:00

I know everyone who owns a van says that. It's a running joke amongst all young families. Our family had a gray Dodge Caravan circa 1992 that had no ac and pop out windows that pinched your fingers when you popped them closed. We drove all over Europe in that thing. My parents also hated it due to the 5 transmissions that had to be replaced in the car. It was a happy moment in the Teetsel family when we donated it to missions and bought a Ford Taurus (????) instead. We never bought another van and I railed against vans all throughout high school, college, and after college. I'll never forget going to Spring Canyon after I had been out of college for a year and a gal I was working with just got a new Sienna for her family. She was so excited and I just didn't understand what could be so exciting about a minivan......

Fast forward a bunch of years. I really like our Camry, but now that we have all these dang kids, it has become quite the pain in the rear to pack up and go...anywhere. Addison has to get in first to the middle seat, I put Ian's carseat on the ground and go over to Ainsley's side, strap her in, come back around to Addison who is still whining and complaining that she can't get to her buckle, buckle her, stick Ian in, and then go back around to my side of the car. I inevitably leave a door open and have to go back and close it. Yeah. ANYWHERE WE GO!!! Then there's the proximity of the kids in the backseat, but I'm sure you can imagine how annoying that was. With Devin's car on the fritz, we decided to start a "van fund" asap!

I had been scoping out craigslist for several months looking for a Toyota Sienna or a Honda Odyssey that had less than 100k miles and was in our price range (under $10k) and just wasn't finding anything. I live in Johnson County. We like our vans here. So when I was perusing craigslist and found a really well maintained 2004 Odyssey with 79,000 just slightly out of price range I got really excited. Then I talked the owner down to our price range and got really, really excited. Then I remembered that our price range was dependant on Devin selling his car and my excitement dwindled. Then I thought "well maybe we could just borrow some money--it's only $2 or 3k, which is what Devin will get for his car, it'll be ok." Even if Devin didn't sell his car we knew we could pay back the loan in a couple of months.

We were all set to go ahead and borrow the money to get the van, but we just had a bad feeling about it. It wasn't a huge bad feeling--just a small bad feeling deep down inside. I kept trying to drown it out by using logic. The truth is we had been looking a long time and hadn't found anything like this car. I knew a dealer was going to buy the van and sell it for $3,000 more if we didn't buy it. It also wasn't like we had just decided to buy a car out of the blue one day. It was exactly what I had been looking for. The more I thought about the van, the more I knew it just wasn't a good idea to borrow the money. We had just paid off $62,000 in December and we were really looking forward to the feeling of paying cash for a car for the first time ever in our lives. I honestly felt like God was telling me "just wait, just wait. Trust me, I'll provide for you." I just had no peace about going forward with the loan and I am blessed to have a husband who listens to his wife's "gut feelings". He said we could wait.

It sounds so ridiculous, but I threw a big fat hissy fit. I was really bummed out about having to shove those kids in the Camry for who knows how many more months. The truth is--I felt a lot better deep inside and had peace.

I emailed the seller and basically just laid it out to her: that we had most of the money and just needed to sell Devin's car and that we didn't feel right about borrowing money. I told her we were really disappointed and that I was really mad at Dave Ramsey at the moment. :) I honestly felt kind of stupid telling her all those details, but hey, it was the truth!

I got an email from her later that evening. This is what it said:
I have been listening to Dave Ramsey for years and I would really like for your beautiful family to have this van. If you really want it, we can wait for you to do it the right way. Like I told you, I don't want to sell it to a dealer and we are not in a hurry. If you still want to get it checked tomorrow by a mechanic, and then wait till your other car sells, we are ok with that. Just your word that you will let us know if you change your mind is all we need. I can take it off of craigslist and give you time to get yours sold. This is has been a wonderful vehicle for our family and it would make me feel really good to know that it is going to be appreciated by a family who needs it as much as we did when we bought it. Talk it over and let me know what you decide.

Hurray!! Yay God!! Yay Dave Ramsey!!We put Devin's car on craigslist that night and would you believe it sold two days later? Yep. A guy was driving through Kansas from Illinois on his way to Denver and wanted a 4Runner. He grilled Devin about the car over the phone and paid him $2300 in cash at 10:30 at night. This was especially exciting because if you haven't seen Devin's car, it's...special.

We picked up the van the next evening and have been happily driving it these last couple weeks. The only thing missing is the family members stickers for the back window. Here is a corny picture of "the trading of the vans" from their family to ours.

Thanks for reading our story. It is definitely a memorable one for our little family.

Kicking worry to the curb

2011-04-22T21:41:00.000-07:00

I haven't blogged in so long that I almost don't know where to begin!

Did you know that I am a closet worrier? I try my very best to hide it behind a laid back demeanor, but yeah...it's true. I think it was easy for me to hide it because I don't worry about a lot of things that other moms might obsess over: germs, napping schedules, food allergies, THAT stuff.

I guess in my mind I thought it was acceptable or even wise to worry about the biggies. For years I thought God was "preparing me for the worst" when I'd worry about things in my own life, or that I was showing "Christian Concern" when I'd worry about my friends and loved ones. If I'm being vague here are some examples:

-When we didn't have life insurance I worried when Devin was just a few minutes late coming home. I thought for sure that he had died in a car accident and that I'd be a destitute widow.

-I thought for sure that since some of my very best friends suffered through miscarriages that "God was preparing me" to lose baby Ainsley. I worried to the point of tears through most of my pregnancy. She was just fine!

-I worried about my dad finding a job...twice.

-I worried that my sweet mother in law would never regain her sense of smell or taste and how that would impact her life.

-I worried lots and lots and lots about money.

-I worried lots about my friends: for their marriages, loss of jobs, that they'd find a relationship, etc etc etc etc etc.

-Then there's the usuals: that my kids could get very sick, in a horrible freak accident, SIDS, etc. etc etc etc etc etc

I thought all of this was normal! I thought worrying for my loved ones was a way for my mercy gift to be put to use.

This last year God has been really teaching me that I was so very wrong and that I was robbing myself of joy, trying to be in control, and um, sinning.

You know that verse in Matthew? The one in all red because it's all Jesus talking. The one where he directly tells us not to worry? Yeah. That's about everything. When we choose to ignore that and worry anyway, we are ignoring a direct command from Jesus. I learned this a few weeks ago at a women's retreat and it was really eye opening for me. I know it's not mind boggling or anything like that, but it's truth that hit me in a new light. Here are some more of my favorite verses about worry:

For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline
2 Timothy 1:7

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.
John 14:27

Here's my all-time favorite:

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6-7

So let me tell you what I've been doing, how I've been stopping the madness:
Most of the times my worries come when I'm sitting in church (I have a short attention span) or laying in bed at night and my mind is whirling. The fear will pop in my head. I can't stop it from popping up, but I can choose what to do with it at that point: I can either go down the "rabbit hole of what-ifs" where I create whole scenerios (that are usually awful) or I can talk to God about it.

Last week I was sitting in church and kind of sort of listening to the sermon when I started becoming fearful that something could happen to baby Ian during childbirth. The rabbit hole started: I started to dwell on how I'd handle it, what I'd say to people, even what I'd do with the baby room until I literally had to tell myself to STOP! I immediately prayed to God and told him my fear and asked him to take it away. That instant I had an image of a smiling boy in my head. Seriously! My first thought was "Did I imagine that or did God put that there?" I guess I'll never know for sure, but I believe it was God, and I am so grateful for that little moment.

This is all going to take lots of time. I think the temptation to worry will always be there. Sometimes I have to pray about the same fear, oh, 25 times a day. I have good days and bad days, and I am determined to beat this, but it will not be with my own strength. The only way I will kick worry to the curb is through the grace of God. My kids and husband deserve a wife who isn't a crazy person. Let's face it, I've already got a few strikes against me with my whole cat obsession. :)

Anyway thanks for reading this book of a blog post. Is worry something you struggle with? Anyone want to join me on this journey?

Awkward can be worth it

2011-03-01T22:22:00.000-08:00

Devin spent all afternoon on Sunday making the walls of our house look beautiful. He was busy hammering, puttying, sanding, and painting until midnight. Because I'm the epitome of a perfect wife, instead of thanking him for all the hard work he did, I blamed him when the outlets quit working in the bathroom that day. "You must have screwed up the wires when you were hammering!" I know, he's just SO lucky! I mean, who wouldn't want me for a wife right?

I realized I never apologized for being such a nag (and when I say nag I am adding some extra a's..naaaaaag...Fran Drescher style). I should do that (apologize, not nag some more).

Anyway he tried pushing the reset button on the outlet and tripping the fuse box a few times with no luck.

I gave it two days for the problem to miraculously solve itself (funny, that never seems to work out very well!) and finally called the electrician (Tann Electric). I used them two years ago when our lights were flickering and our power was going out. Eddie put in a new fuse box and saved our house from burning to the ground (seriously). You know things are bad when you hear a sizzling sound coming from the fuse box.

I was happy to see Eddie again (even though he was four hours late) until he came out of the bathroom less than THREE minutes after he arrived saying "ok it's fixed now." Apparently the outlet in the garage is connected to the outlet in the bathroom, which powers the upstairs outlet. He had to push the reset button in the garage and that was all. I felt pretty dumb for not knowing that, but whatever. I was just glad it was going to be a cheap bill.

I got out the checkbook and asked him what the price was. $94. For three minutes. For pushing a button. I waited all day for him to get there and he pushed a button. I begged him for a discount. He said I should just be grateful that it wasn't something worse and told me all his stories about his other dumb customers that had to pay $100 for him to screw in a lightbulb. NOT HELPING.

I begged and pleaded some more and gave him my most pathetic, pregnancy face. He said he had no control over the pricing. I wrote the check, but just couldn't summon the strength to hand him nearly a hundred dollars for pushing a button.

I gave him more sad, pregnant puppy eyes. He said I could try calling his manager and that maybe they could give me a credit for next time. Yipee. Not. I asked if I could call before he left. I told him I appreciated all of his hard work and made double sure he wouldn't be offended. He said to "Go for it" and that he wouldn't be offended in the least and that he knew how ridiculous that price was.

Oh my gosh, it was so awkward! I had to call and leave the details with the receptionist and then wait, with Eddie sitting on my couch, for the manager to call back. Longest six minutes ever. I was offering him drinks, trying to make small talk, feeling like such a friggin' cheapskate the whole time. Finally the manager called Eddie and I overheard Eddie tell him "Man, she's pregnant with two small kids and could really use the money." Thanks Eddie!!

They slashed my bill from $94 to $45. I think the awkwardness was worth it! I have totally turned into that person...the cheapskate that embarasses her kids, but who cares. It put close to fifty bucks back into my pocket.

So lesson of the day, folks: it never hurts to ask!

I think I'm going to start blogging again. My life has been brimming with blog fodder lately, thanks to Addison and Ainsley.

The Addison quote of the day: "Mom, why do you life coffee so much?"
The Ainsley quote of the day: "Addison spit my head!" Devin found a puddle of spit on the top of her head. Seriously. Who DOES THAT?! Apparently my daughter....

Blog, Shlog

2011-02-21T21:36:00.000-08:00

I'm sorry I've been absent for so long. There are so many things I could blog about my now I just feel too overwhelmed and don't know where to start! I could blog about:

-how I heard Addison reading aloud from the Bible about a witch that steals the sparkles from furry ponies
-how I've developed a second chin from this pregnancy and my belly is starting to hang out of all my shirts (takes the idea of mooning to a whole new level)
-how much easier Addison is to get along with these days and how we're already into "silly stage" where she runs around saying things like "miss me, miss me, now you're gonna kiss me" because she heard Shane say it at preschool and thought it was just so funny.
-how Ainsley bit my leg today and I am trying to decide if I need to start spraying her mouth with apple cider vinegar or just keep doing the time outs.
-how I'm supposed to rub prozac cream on my neighbor's cat's ear while she's in Mexico this week, but the blasted cat hisses and growls and scares the daylights out of me. And Devin!
-how part of me can't wait to have this baby if only to get a break from life for awhile to stay cooped up in the house with him, in sweats, and get a pass from all other obligations.
-how ridiculously difficult it has been to make a decision about where Addison will go to Kindergarten next year and how crazy fast these last 4.5 years have gone by!!
-that we've decide to name our little guy Ian Timothy Riley. And that Addison picked the name Ian on our way to church one Sunday and double checks from time to time that we're still going to name him that. Timothy is Devin's middle name as well as his dad's middle name.
-that Ian means God is merciful. We picked the name because we liked it and that it was kinda fun to tell him his sister chose it, so it could have meant "tree" and we still would have gone with it. I love that it represents the trait of God that means the most to me.
-how Ainsley turned 2 last week and how dang funny she is these days. Her favorite two songs are Jesus Loves Me and Jingle Bells and she asks to sing them both in the car whenever we go anywhere.
-how nice it is to be debt free and how totally worth all that hard work it is. Sadly Dave doesn't seem to want to take my call.
-how our stray cat, Squatter, survived his 4th winter living on our deck and how Devin bought me a house for him for my birthday because he knew I was worried about him AND how I fashioned a door out of duct tape AND how I know if my dad reads this he will mock me for life. It's all good--I was proud of that door!

The possiblities are endless. Someday I'll be back. For now I'll stick with being a blog stalker!

E-Mealz

2011-01-19T21:45:00.000-08:00

I've been trying e-mealz for the past couple weeks. I've got to say I have really enjoyed it! There have been a few things that I just flat out refused to make because I knew we wouldn't like them, a few things that have been really good, and a few things that turned out to be just ok and I probably won't try again.

Pros:
-The recipes are printed off for you along with a grocery list so you just print your list and go to the store
-The meals were all pretty healthy (I'm trying the any store points plan)
-There are always one or two vegetarian options each week, which I think is great.
-Even though they weren't based on sale prices, I was able to get most of my ingredients for 6 meals for about $60, which isn't bad at all!
-I had food! I had ingredients to make dinner! That panicky feeling around 3:00 that I usually get was non existent because I had options in my fridge and pantry! Yipeeee!
-Even though I wasn't crazy about some of the choices, I still had a starting point. For instance one of the meals was Curried Broccoli Chicken, which sounded like a less yummy version of Chicken Divan, one of our family's favorites. It was really easy to just switch that up a little.

Cons:
-Catfish? Ewwwww.....skipping that one!
-They didn't really plan the meals based on the fruits/vegetables that are in season. For instance they called for fresh basil and blueberries for a couple meals this week. I went ahead and paid $3 for the basil, but was not going to shell out money for out of season, wrinkled blueberries just for fruit salad. We had pears instead.
-A couple of the meals were a little lame. For one of them you used a box of jambalya mix and added frozen peppers/onions and chicken. I will admit that my four year old gobbled it up with no complaining. It was pretty tasty.....Ok so maybe that isn't a con. Nevermind!
-I wish they had a specific store list for my area that is based on what's on sale. It's hard to shell out money for the specific meat they call for if it's not on sale. It does seem like they use a lot of chicken and ground turkey, which is easy to stock up on.

I think we're going to stick with it for awhile. Even though I probably am spending a little more than we did before, it's worth the peace of mind and the fact that we're not eating at 8 pm because I had no idea what to make for dinner. Just my two cents!

Ainsley's new bed

2011-01-13T14:19:00.000-08:00

I bought the girls some new bedding from Target a few weeks ago. Ainsley's little toddler comforter and sheets were just so cute that I couldn't resist asking around for a toddler bed to put them on. Then, when a friend from church said I could have her toddler bed and mattress for a grand total of $10, the crib went down and in went the toddler bed

Awww so cute! We even kept the bumper because she is obsessed with it. At first I don't think she realized she could actually get out of it and that made me really excited. Yeah that didn't last very long. Night time has been going ok, but naptime is a whole different story. This girl just loves her new found freedom. Maybe I should paint her face blue and call her Braveheart...errr....William Wallace. Nevermind.

The point is I really wish we had just kept the stinking crib up a little longer. This is what happened today:
12:30 Ainsley falls asleep in car when dropping Addison off at school. Yes! I can transition her! This is will be perfect...
12:35 Ainsley wakes up when I take her coat and boots off, but drowsily reaches for her bumper and closes her eyes.
12:40 I hear chatter from upstairs. I try to ignore it but go upstairs and see Ainsley playing with some of Addison's jewelry...with a poopy diaper. Back in bed she goes with a myriad of binkies to choose from as well as some books to look at.
1:00 Talking has not subsided. Hear a crash upstairs. Ainsley is sitting in one of the plastic bins under Addison's bed seen in picture #1. Back in bed she goes with more books and a kiss goodnight.
1:15 I hear "mommmmmma! mommmmma! and more banging. Ignore it for a few minutes and look in the room. Hmm. No Ainsley. I look in my room and the bathroom. Still no Ainsley. I hear her calling me. She shut herself in the closet. ARRRRGGGHHH! Back in bed she goes. This child is not napping.

I eventually gave up on naptime when I realized I'd have to wake her up in 45 minutes to pick Addison up at preschool. I decided to try again after preschool. She proceeds to have the biggest meltdown imaginable because...big surprise....SHE'S TIRED!

After school she got up a few times but the Supernanny methode of sticking her back in bed without saying a word finally did the trick and she's sleeping. I know this will get easier...

ANYWAY

The last few days have been busy, but good! Rachel came in to town and sadly we did not get a single picture together. We had a great lunch with Andrea and Kelly on Saturday, and then she came over on Tuesday while Brandon interviewed for some jobs and spent the whole morning and afternoon together. It was wonderful. We talked, drank coffee (with creamer of course), I got to have lots of cuddle time with little Nolan, and we even played a few rounds of Go Fish and Princess Yahtzee (to Addison's great delight). Rach I am not sure what these next few months have in store for you, but it sure is great having you back in town!

I'm at about 23 weeks and feeling pretty good: just BIG. My belly and other anatomical parts are growing at a rapid pace that I find slightly disturbing. My doctor reassured me that I am measuring where I should be, but I feel like a boat. A yacht, actually. Things are different with #3. How the heck did Michelle Duggar do this 20 times?! I always feel a little out of breath and am just plain pooped all the time.

I think we have pretty much settled on the name Ian for this little guy, picked by his 4 year old sister. We were in the car on the way to church discussing names and she piped up from her carseat "How about Ian?" We aren't sure on a middle name yet, but we'll keep you posted.

Now I am going to enjoy this brief moment of peace and quiet while it lasts....

Stuff heard 'round these parts

2010-12-02T17:20:00.000-08:00

"Diaper cream is for bottoms not faces, Ainsley"

Addison: "Here you go Mom" as she hands me something...
Me: "What is that?"
Addison: "My booger"

"Ainsley is that poop on your hands?!?"
Ainsley: "yep!"

"Ainsley, plastic bags don't go on your head."

I would also like to announce that the kids singing "Sloppy Joes, sloppy sloppy Joes" from Billy Madison are mine. Can I help it if it comes to mind every time I make one? "I'll make them extra schloppy for ya!" ;)

Now if you'll excuse me I need to get downstairs. I do believe Ainsley could be walking around with that bag still on her head.

A good laugh at work...

2010-11-27T23:15:00.000-08:00

A mom is shopping at Baby Gap with her 3 year old. Three year old picks up a pair of fleece pj's and says "This is sexy!"

Laughter ensues.

Priceless Gift

2010-11-23T21:18:00.000-08:00

I have heard about Jesse trees for about a year now. They're a different kind of way to celebrate advent, but very visual and interesting for kids. It basically traces the lineage of Jesus back to Adam w/ really neat symbols and Bible verses.

I got an email awhile ago from a friend that said she was putting together a Jesse Tree ornament exchange. You pick your symbol, make 28 of the same ornament, and trade them amongst friends so everyone goes home with a completed tree. My first thought was "oh heck no. I don't do crafts and I don't do 28 crafts. And I don't do 28 crafts in the middle of all this morning sickness and busy-ness. I also don't do 28 crafts with Ainsley anywhere in the house." Can we say disaster? Then there was the money aspect: I know you can craft on the cheap, but I just didn't have any extra pennies to put toward this idea this year. To summarize: not the year for it. I found some neat Jesse Tree printouts and so my plan (for NEXT year!!) was to just hang those on a tree and eventually trade the printouts for ornaments as the years progressed.

At MOPS on Monday the presenter (who happened to be one of the ladies involved in the Jesse Tree exchange) had the finished tree on the stage to show off to give all the moms ideas for ways to introduce Spiritual things to our kiddos around the holidays. I sat there looking at that tree, wishing I had just summoned the energy to make the ornaments so I could have one to do with Addison and Ainsley. Again, it inspired me for next year (or let's be honest here....the next year after that!)

Tonight Devin and I were having dinner with my very wonderful friend Alicia and her husband John. At the end of dinner she came over with a shirt box and said "This is a Christmas present from the Hansens to the Rileys." I knew what was in there, and I started crying before I even opened the box. Inside were 28 ornaments from the Jesse Tree exchange. Alicia had taken part in the exchange and had given me all of her ornaments. The ornaments were all created by ladies from church that I love and admire. These ornaments will be in the Riley household for YEARS, and everytime I pull one out I will remember each of those ladies, and Alicia for so selflessfly giving me this special gift. I honestly can't think of a cooler way to kick off the Christmas season. I love you Alicia. Thank you so very much.

Taking 2 kids to your OB check ups

2010-11-01T11:17:00.000-07:00

My mom has watched the girls for me the last couple times, but let's face it: there are lots of appointments and sometimes it just seems easier to bring them along. Here were the highlights:

-getting lost on the way even though I've already been there twice this pregnancy.
-having our name called quickly and getting my hopes up that our wait will be really short, only to end up waiting longer in the tiny exam room instead of out in the nice big open waiting room with a kids area. Next time we're going back out there to wait and the doc can come get us!
-peeing in a cup in a tiny bathroom with my two kids standing right in front of me and wondering what in the heck I am doing.
-bringing skittles for them to eat during the appointment. Ainsley managed to eat them neatly for the first half of the bag. The second half was smeared all over her face, shirt, and hands. That was a nice sticky mess.
-Addison saying "I have to go to the bathroom!" right in the middle of my time with the midwife. She was super sweet about it and even offered to keep Ainsley entertained while I took Addison (even though I know she had other people waiting. My sincere apologies to those people who were waiting, but you gotta do what you gotta do). It helps when your midwife is a mom of two young kids too.

Really, in the grand scheme of things, this was a pretty easy breezy experience. No trantrums. No poopy diaper blowouts or accidents, etc. etc. etc. The best part was that my midwife plopped the girls up on the exam table with me and let them help "hear" the baby's heartbeat. She had to completely maneuver around both of them, but it was a really sweet moment.

I think we'll get to find out the sex in about 6 weeks!

Oh and yeah we stayed another 15 minutes so the kids could play in the play area. I got to read a magazine. They played. Win-win.

Halloween Plans

2010-10-28T07:40:00.000-07:00

As a kid we went trick or treating and dressed up in normal costumes until my mom decided those days were over. Then it was the good 'ol Halloween Alternatives at the church! Yep biblical costumes and all! I was Queen Esther and Eric was Jonah (complete with a gigantic blow up whale). I think in middle school we started trick or treating again with friends and that was the end of that. I never went to another Halloween alternative celebration again and swore I would never do that to my kids. I mean, it's just so....dorky.

The idea of them just kinda bugs me. I mean, if you think it's that evil of a holiday than why are you still participating in the general idea? Is putting on a costume and going to church different than putting on a costume and walking around the neighborhood? In 9th or 10th grade my mom decided to put bible verses on all the candy we handed out and I was MORTIFIED at the time, but now I think that was a pretty stinking good idea!

As for me personally, I know my own boundaries. I can't step foot in a haunted house or watch a horror movie because I really can't handle scary things. I get images in my head that I can't get out and I have a difficult time sleeping without nightmares. At the same time, I really don't feel convicted about putting Addison in a princess costume and walking around the neighborhood with her.

Our church never did the Halloween alternative thing. Ever (well in the 5 years we've lived here). And we're Baptist!! All those years I was so proud.... Then I was at a MOPS steering team meeting and someone announced that we were having a trunk or treat. My heart kind of sank a little. I mean, not totally, but a little bit. REALLY? Our church is doing that?! Awww maaaaan!! What's next our own church gym or church yoga studio? Just kidding....

Then I thought about it for a couple of months. Hmmmm...this could be kind of fun. First we're going to have a big carnival with blow ups and rides and food and then the kids will go around and get candy from people we know. How fun is that?! To see so many friends and see their kids' costumes? You know I am a girl who loves to socialize. We'll all be in the same place! A couple in our life group has a vintage car from the 50s in great condition so we decided to use their car and do a soda shop theme. I mean, this is going to be really fun! I am totally on board now.

Ha! You should have seen the look on my mom's face when I told her the news about participating in this thing. Like my next move would be to dress the girls in denim jumpers, french braid their hair, and talk about homeschooling (not that I have anything against homeschooling. If someone else wants to homeschool my kids (for free) they're hired!!).

Yes I have changed. Who'd have thunk? What are you guys doing for Halloween?

New, Yummy Recipe

2010-10-08T17:19:00.000-07:00

I made Italian Skillet Dinner last night and we all happily chowed it down. Addison even ate two bowls of it. It's really good, easy and really healthy. I thought I'd share it with you since I'm all about food these days.

1 lb turkey Italian Sausage
1/2 chopped green pepper
1 medium onion, chopped
1 14.5 oz can diced tomatoes
2 cups vegetable juice
1 1/2 cups brown INSTANT rice (uncooked)
1 c shredded mozzarella cheese

Cook sausage w/ a small amount of olive oil so it doesn't stick to the pan for 4 minutes. Add peppers and onion and cook until softened.

Add tomatoes and vegetable juice. Cook and stir until mixture boils. Remove from heat and stir in rice (uncooked). Let simmer for about 5 minutes, stir, and remove from heat. Cover and let stand for another 5 minutes or so until the rice is cooked.

Add mozzarella cheese and serve.
Because the v8 juice cooks the rice, it is really flavorful.

Anyway things around here have been ok. I've still been dealing with my little friend called morning sickness and this friend is not treating me well. I have tried everything under the sun and there have been a few things that help:

-Eating all the time. So much that I am totally dreading getting on the scale for my next appointment.
-Those preggie pops. Yes they actually work. I was a total skeptic, but I shelled out the $5 for that tiny little tin and they came through for me. They leave a horrible taste in my mouth so I have to keep peppermint gum around to help with that.
-Yogurt--not sure why, but it does help relieve the nausea a bit.

Here are my latest cravings:
-Fish tacos (oh my gosh I want to go to On the Border or Houlihans or Cheesecake Factory SO BAD!!)
-Jamoca Shake from Arby's. I wouldn't recommend giving some to your 20 month old. She will dance and jump all over the place late in the evening and you will have to explain to your husband why she is so hyper. I really wish I had video taped this....
-grapes, yogurt (see there are some healthy things on the list)

ANYWAY

Devin had a long work trip to California last week, so the girls and I drove to Manhattan with Heather and Noah and had a little sleepover with the lovely Leah Graves. Yes Leah hosted us and all of our crazy kids. We ate all her food and made a lot of noise and probably scarred her husband for life, but he was extremely sweet and welcoming too. He even made mac n cheese for all the kids. It was a great little getaway and I got to have all my favorite Manhattan things like Rock-A-Belly Deli and Call Hall Ice Cream combined with seeing wonderful friends. It was fun to show Addison where Dev and I went to college even though I'm not sure she totally understood. I need to buy one of those shirts that says "I Miss Manhattan" because it is certainly true.

This Wednesday I am going on another little adventure: the girls and I are flying to DC to see Devin's parents and for me to attend Dan Triman and Julia Golden's wedding. Dan and I went to high school together in Maryland. He was dating one of my best friends and we became friends. When they broke up she and I had kind of drifted apart, but Dan and I realized how good of friends we had become and stayed in touch all through college and beyond. Julia is wonderful and they are perfect for each other. I just need to find where the heck Woodstock, Maryland is and I'm all set to celebrate with them! I am also really excited to spend time with Devin's parents too. There's lots of celebrating to do with them: Roz's surgery went extremely well, Devin's dad got a new job and they are in contract on a new house. Then there's the whole baby thing. :)

I am sorry I don't have any pics to post. Our camera is a real piece of junk and barely works these days. We really need to get a new one, especially before baby comes along.

Love you guys!

It's been awhile!

2010-09-23T14:09:00.000-07:00

Hi blogging friends!

Sorry I've been out of commission for the last few weeks! There has been lots happening around the Riley house: some good, some not so good and to top it all off I've been really busy!

I'm pretty sure all of you know by now, but we are pregnant with Riley kid #3. I was so excited about this baby and the whole idea of having a 3rd just brings me so much joy. I am not sure how we are going to fit this baby in our house or in our Camry, but we have about 8 months or so to figure it out.

I wish I could figure out an easy way to get rid of this morning sickness. It is killing me! Oh man...I wake up each day feeling nauseous and go to bed every night feeling the same way. When I wake up in the middle of the night the nausea is still there. I have heard that morning sickness indicates a surge in hormones and that there is a less chance in miscarriage, so on one hand the nausea makes me feel a sense of relief, but WOW, it sure is hard to deal with this everyday. Praise the Lord for preschool!!! Addison goes to preschool for 2 1/2 hours 3 days a week and it's only 4 minutes away. We drop her off, Ainsley takes a nap, and I watch TV and nap and rest and do nothing (and feel kind of guilty) for that whole time. It is worth every penny.

It helps that Addison loves preschool. She unbuckles herself, throws her backpack over her shoulder and runs up the steps to the door full speed ahead, always stopping to wave and say "Bye mommy!" I don't even have to get out of the car! It's even cuter when we pick her up. Ainsley and I come inside and Ainsley runs in front of all the parents who are waiting to catch a glimpse of Addison. She is always so happy to see her after those 2 hours. Then Addison hugs all of her new friends and gives me the "preschool scoop" on the way home. "Mom, Trent got in trouble because he was chewing with his mouth open" etc...

Because I can't seem to write a post without talking about car drama, I've got more for you! All summer long the Camry's been giving us trouble, but Devin's 97 4runner was holding strong. Then it started overheating and leaking coolant. Thinking it would probably be a quick fix, we took it in. Baaaaaad news awaited us at Midas: $3k Have you ever heard of such a thing? THREE THOUSAND DOLLARS to fix a car? What the heck? That is just crazy! Well considering:

-the radio doesn't work
-two of the doors are pink
-the back won't open because the bumper is dented

and all of this new stuff, Devin doesn't want to fix it. It's only worth $3k to begin with. So now it's up for sale on craigslist and we're trying to decide what we're going to do next. We are only a few months away from paying off our debt, so we have decided to try the one car thing, pay off the debt, and then start saving up for another car.

I know it is not the end of the world, but frankly, I am really frustrated and angry. We have been working so hard and staying on a budget for four years, the end is in site, and now any money that would be used for a fun "we're out of debt" trip has to go towards another car. The thing is, I know we could go out today and get a really nice car with probably a pretty low payment. It would be so easy and it's so tempting. I just know that is not the answer. If we did that, what will we have learned this whole time? I am not judging anyone who has a car payment, I just know how difficult paying off all this debt has been and I don't really want to jump back into round 2. We'd also like to start saving up for a down payment on a bigger house, but how can we do all of these things?

I was so furious this afternoon. Sure we won't have any debt, but I thought we were supposed to feel "richer" than this. But I don't. Things are just as tight around here as they were before and will be even tighter if we have to save up for another car. Anyway I was pretty mad and felt like God was leading me to open up the Bible to get some perspective. Nope. Didn't want to. Too frustrated. I watched Oprah instead. It was about this Colombian lady who was kidnapped for 6 and a half years. Now THAT is perspective. She talked about how she was brought to God during the ordeal and her favorite verse was from 2 Corinthians 12:9 "My grace is sufficient for thee."

Not a fun get out of debt trip, not a nicer car, not having the ease of two cars, but just Him. That should be enough. He will provide our needs; he always has. I feel like I am learning this lesson a whole bunch of times, and it's always hard to go through, but I am so thankful for a God who gives us second chances and a God who does care about our needs, trivial that they may be sometimes.

Thanks for listening!

My Mom

2010-08-30T11:08:00.000-07:00

Link over to Brooke for more info on Mommy Guilt Monday.

Today we're all posting a little something about our moms.

I think the thing I should appreciate more about my mom is how firmly she believes in me. She accepts me for who I am and doesn't expect me to be like her, but she believes in me so much she won't let me believe lies. Whenever I start to act like a martyr or feel sorry for myself, she speaks truth. Sometimes it upsets me. Let's face it, when life sucks sometimes you just want to sit in a big ol' pitty pot for a little bit. Considering my spiritual gift is mercy, when people I love are hurting I like to jump in the pit with them and stay awhile. I believe this is good initially, but not for too long. That's where my mom comes in. She is just amazing at pushing her loved ones to be what God has in mind for them.

There's a quote that says "A friend loves you for who you are, understands where you've been, and still gently invites you to grow." She is just so wonderful at that. Whenever I throw out my dreams ( I have a lot of ideas) she is the one to say "Well what would the first step to that be?" When I got a grant writing position she believed in me and said "Yes I believe you can do that!" even though I had a lot of doubts.

Even though I say things like "let me be" or "leave me alone" or "quit pushing me" to her fairly often, I am so thankful for a mom who wants me to grow. It has nothing to do with measuring up. I know she loves me where I am; it's about her knowing what is best for me.

Love you mom.

Mom of the Year

2010-08-29T20:39:00.000-07:00

I volunteer at the church every Thursday. My job is to send out postcards and call all the parents of preschoolers who visit our church. I love it! It's so fun to meet with all these new people and get them plugged in.

Anyway, now that Addison has started preschool we have to bring a lunch to church and eat there because she has to go right to school when we're done at church. On this particular day I had little Lucy with me (one year old girl I nanny for twice a week). I manage to get all the kids outside to the playground at church, settled and eating lunch. Ainsley as usual wanders over to the playground to play, Addison's munching, and I'm spoonfeeding Lucy. All of a sudden I hear the words few parents enjoy hearing when they're in the middle of something:

"I have to go to the bathroom"

Great.

We are outside, on the opposite end of the church where the restrooms are. Our food is all laid out, the kids are all settled. There's no way I'm getting three kids inside in time. Not happening.

There was lots of nice grass around the playground. Hmmm....
No one is around right now.....the parking lot is dead....... Hmmmmmm

Plan B!

Addison and I walked over to the side of the playground, I maneuvered her in squatting position, and she went.

In the middle of the "going" I hear a car beep. Uh oh. I look up and there is Judy, the director of our Childrens' Ministry opening up her car door. Right next to us.

I was mortified. I started stammering something about having three kids with me...too hard...bla bla bla, but inside I was DYING. I mean, who lets their daughter pee in the grass right in front of church?!

She just chuckled and said "Ohh I'm just smiling." I take it she's been there, done that, bought the t-shirt. One can only hope.

P.S. Addison loves preschool
P.S.S. I love the delightful 2 1/2 hours I have to myself while Addison is in preschool.

I love to laugh.....HA HA HA!

2010-08-24T13:04:00.000-07:00

(Mary Poppins)

but sometimes my sense of humor gets me into trouble. It's been this way since I was in jr. high. Even to this day, I can take it a touch too far. People who don't know me that well think I'm a weirdo or just completely inappropriate. It even messes up my witness as a Christian.

Like how at Spring Canyon (when I was 15) I got in trouble for my "I Never" statements, and I felt so terrible about it, telling my supervisor "I don't want people to think I'm nasty!!!!"

Or the time at 17 how my friend and I made up a fairy tale that involved trolls and dragons and one particular staffer that we didn't care for. It got in the wrong hands. Oops again.

Perhaps 25/30 facebook status updates? Oops.

Or my snarky comment about my co-worker at Baby Gap. I felt so bad about that one that I had to go back and tell him what I had said and ask if he'd forgive me. That was tough.

There are so many other instances. I'm 28 and sometimes I still do and say stuff that I wish I hadn't. I wish I had remembered the filter. I call it "foot in mouth" disease.

Gossip is right up there with that stuff. There is something about having a nice piece of juicy gossip--you just can't wait to tell it to someone. I am not sure if it is because you want to fit in or again, make people laugh. The thing is, once it's out...you feel disgusting. You feel like a failure. You lose people's trust. It's really pretty awful. I am making a pledge to give that up forever. I know I will fail at this more times than not, but I was thinking how amazing it would be to never gossip again. To never say "have you heard about so and so?" What if you had that legacy? And you all know me well enough to know I don't think I'm better than anyone else. It's hard for us all. The thing is, I've seen what gossip can do to people when it gets bad. It destroys relationships. It's terrible.

Let's just be real for a quick sec: I'm not talking about celebrity gossip!! Like Jake and Vienna: will they get back together? and should the Duggars really have another baby?! That doesn't count!!

Anyway I'm still learning, and I'm trying to be honest about where the line is. Sometimes it's hard to find the balance between "real" and inappropriate. It's so wonderful to have a great laugh (a belly laugh) but not at someone else's expense. You know?

Like I said. I'm still learning. No this is not about that triathlon shirt comment on facebook. That shirt was hysterical. I want one, but my dad thinks it was only funny because the lady wearing it was well in her 50s and quite heavy. Then again Devin would be mortified. Or would he be proud?! See, here I go again....I CAN'T STOP!

This is actually referring to my wine picture on my facebook page. We are supposed to submit pictures for our first Mops meeting. I stumbled across that one of me drinking a glass of wine at Cheesecake Factory and thought about sending it to the girl collecting them to see what she'd say. Thinking she might not get the joke I instead posted it for all of my 700 friends to see......

That would be fine and good except for now I have a leadership position at MOPS and have 95 new friends. Some of them might not get that I only had one glass and not 6. :::sigh::::

Live and learn. And keep on laughing, but maybe I should try to take it down a notch.

Thanks for listening.

Ainsley.....

2010-08-22T21:29:00.000-07:00

Yesterday afternoon was a little crazy. Devin took Addison for the afternoon to scope out Longview Lake, and I was home with Ainsley (18 months). I was putzing around on the internet and texting and basically not paying much attention to her. Our house is pretty childproof these days, and I saw her running back and forth so I wasn't too worried about her getting into anything.

Oops.

I see her toss a big handful of something onto the couch next to me and realize what it is. Oh dear Lord it's cat litter. It's everywhere. She dumped it on both of our living room chairs, all over the kitchen floor, all over the living room floor, and all over the couch. It was a mess. It was disgusting. I wanted to cry thinking about cleaning/disinfecting all of this nastiness. Thank God almighty Devin had changed the box right before he left or it would have been even more disgusting.

It seriously took about 45 minutes to clean up in there. I had to empy the vacuum cleaner three times.

Normally Addison and Ainsley are together 24/7, so that means Ainsley has her own security detail all day long. Addison tells me EVERYTHING she is doing (or thinking about doing). But toddler-cop was out with Dad for the afternoon, and Ainsley was having some serious fun making that big (disgusting) mess.

I definitely learned a big lesson about watching that little munchkin. She's only in the 3rd percentile for weight, but she sure does know how to get into some big trouble.

A silly post...

2010-08-20T11:09:00.000-07:00

I grew up an Army brat, so my mom mostly shopped at the commissary. Even when we lived a good hour or so from the closest commissary, my mom would take the cooler once a month and load up. The commissary doesn't (or didn't back in the day) carry generic items, so I grew up with Kraft singles, Yoplait yogurt, Teddy Grahams, Ritz crackers, Peter Pan Peanut Butter and Wheat Thins. The result of my upbringing, is that I turned into a total food snob. This lasted through college. I refused to shop at Aldi (when we should have been shopping there the most) because I heard they didn't carry any brand names. I thought about the one or two experiences I had at Food 4 Less when I literally saw a roach crawling in the produce section, and figured Aldi would be the same way.

Then we had to get on a budget and that included food. Oh and there's no more commissary (even though my mom still takes me sometimes and I have a grand 'ol time there with all my coupons). I love using coupons and combining them with rock bottom sales, so I haven't had to completely give up the good stuff. In fact, sometimes it's cheaper to buy name brand with a coupon and a good sale than generic stuff. Like with toothpaste. I haven't paid for toothpaste in four years.

Well sometimes there are no sales and no coupons, at least when it comes to stuff you need and I am here to tell you that in these past four years, I HAVE EMBRACED THE GENERICS! THEY ARE MY BFF'S.

$3.50 for a box of Ritz crackers? I think not. I'll go with the "Thin Wheat Crackers" for a $1.75 thank you very much.

My mom and my brother were arguing about who makes the best peanut butter, and while Peter Pan still remains my fave, I piped in "I like Midwest Country Fair!!!" They all looked me like I was a frugal freak. It's ok. A lot of people think that, including my Grandpa who said "She just might have a little Yiddish in her" to my dad.

We buy generic toilet paper (it's true; sometimes our bathroom is no different than a gas station--just cleaner), generic applesauce, generic pasta, generic brownies (those Aldi brownies are really good) and even Aldi's whole bean dark roast coffee. My pantry is a smorgasbord of generic goodness.

Let's be honest for a minute though: does anyone else cringe when they have to reach for the Always Save brand? I'd almost rather pay 10 cents more than reach for that disturbingly florescent yellow can. They should really look into changing their packaging.

Although I am no longer a food label snob, there are a few things I won't budge on:

-Tide (it's my favorite). I use it for the really dirty stuff and use whatever else is on sale for the dark stuff.

-Oscar Meyer lunchmeat. I am ok with Hillshire Farm or some fresh deli meat from the counter, but I can't choke down some of those other brands. Neither will the kids.

-Sliced Cheese. Have you ever noticed there are levels in quality with the sliced cheese? Even at Aldi. There's the good stuff and the plastic stuff. I've made this mistake. I go for the good stuff.

-Coffee creamer. I get that there's "bad stuff" in there, but it's my fave. It makes coffee drinking an experience. The generic brands have even more bad stuff than the name brands, so we go with the name brands.

-Nutrition stuff. We buy whole grain bread rather than white bread because it's better for you; same with whole wheat tortillas, low fat shredded cheese, whole grain pasta, etc. etc. I'm starting to see more and more versions of healthy generic stuff, but it's just worth it in the long run to pay a little more. You can buy 3 boxes of fruit snacks for the price of a pint or two of blueberries sometimes, but it's just worth it.

Soapbox moment: Does that really bother anyone else? I hate that about this country. No one should have to stand in the grocery aisle and debate a pint of blueberries vs. box of graham crackers for a snack. When our grocery envelope is really low, I have had to do that and frankly, it pisses me off! I tried growing my own strawberries but my lawn guy killed them all (he's no longer our lawn guy).

What are your favorite brands? What won't you budge on? How do you keep your grocery budget down?

Are you sure you want me on your leadership team?

2010-08-17T14:02:00.000-07:00

Here's a tip for all you moms out there, and this is free advice:

Make sure when you get a text invite for a playdate that you know who the text is from.

Otherwise you will get your kids + little Lucy (nanny for her twice a week) packed up in the car (in the rain), unload them (in the rain) , get them up two flights of stairs, knock on the door only to be greeted by your friend's very confused four year old. You will realize very quickly that the playdate was actually 25 minutes away at a different friend's house. You will feel quite stupid, but this friend has been your friend for a long time and will just shake her head and chuckle at you.

Thankfully this friend was invited to the same playdate, and is running late too. Then, the two of you will somehow get all 6 kids down the stairs, back out to the car (still raining), buckled in, and to the correct location.

The friend of the correct playdate location might think you are totally crazy, but still lets you show up an hour late, serves you and your kids a delicious lunch, and all the kids have a great time together. The moms do too.

Her name is now programmed in my cell phone. :)

Good thing my kids are relatively flexible. Life with me is always an adventure.

Bad-mommy-rehab

2010-08-07T19:02:00.000-07:00

READ THIS FIRST!

Hello, My name is Marie, and I am a Mommy Guilt-a-holic.....
But not anymore!

Here are some of the reasons why I think I am a pretty dang good mom:

-My heart swelled with pride when Devin showed me a "camera" Addison made out of duplo legos, complete with a "flash" and viewfinder.
-I may not use organic this or that, but I can make some pretty rad designs out of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and carrot sticks.
-I discovered my kids will eat blueberries like candy (and beg for them) if they are frozen.
-I let Addison crack the eggs even though I grimace seeing the bits of egg shells in the muffin and cookie batter
-I let my 18 month old fingerpaint even though it was the messiest disaster you've ever seen (see post below)
-I let Ainsley fall asleep in my lap last night instead of screaming in her bed. She is getting some molars and I can tell she's in a lot of pain. I had a lot of work to do on the computer for MOPS, but she needed me.
-Addison asks "Is this on sale?" instead of "Can I have this?" when she wants something from the store because she knows I'll say "No, it's not on sale" I guess this is more of a "good frugal mom, but it makes me laugh"
-Ainsley yells out "AMEN!" multiple times when we're praying because she's heard us say it.
-Both the girls will know how much God loves them.
-I have swirled many a poopy panty in the toilet and washed them (WITH BLEACH) instead of throwing them away because it's usually Addison's favorite pairs that get pooped in, and I try my best to salvage them.
-I let Addison wear a black, long sleeved, VELVET dress w/ mismatched socks and brown shoes in 98 degree heat because that was what she wanted to wear. Thank goodness we were only going to the goodwill store, and she played nicely with a little boy who wasn't wearing any shoes.
-We spend a lot of time with friends. I am hoping I'm teaching my girls the value of a good friendship, and that sometimes it's ok to let all the housework slide to develop a relationship.
-I love making up songs and singing them. Once we made up a song about being late for church. Another time we made up a song about how much Ainsley likes to eat bananas. Addison thinks my songs are the greatest thing ever, and Ainsley likes to dance to them.

Good idea Brooke. Moms need to do this kind of stuff more often!

Why we haven't fingerpainted in over a year

2010-08-06T23:24:00.001-07:00

Someone gave us a whole bunch of finger paints, like, two years ago. I've let Addison use them a few times, but it really just stresses me out. I know...you'd think I'd be the kind of person who would be fine with my kid making a big huge mess and well, I just really hate cleaning up all that paint.

Anyway, Addison was begging me to let her "hand paint" and Ainsley has never
had the chance to give it a try, so I let them go outside and paint.

Things started off ok: Ainsley started off by taking a big taste of the paint (of course), but then figured out what to do from watching Addison

Look of pure delight

Starting to get a little messier now. Hmmm...going off the table.

Oh dear....

Mmmk. Where's the hose?

See you next year fingerpaints.

Nag Alert, neeeeenerrrrrrr

2010-08-05T21:55:00.000-07:00

Please don't let this silly post keep you from reading about my mother-in-law Roz and praying for her (see below).

Anyway,

I blogged awhile back about being a nag/ control freak. It hasn't been too pretty lately. I owe lots of people apologies. I nag my four year old about wearing weird pool shoes with a cream colored poofy party dress just in case someone at Hy-vee thinks I can't dress my kid.

I nag my poor friend about MOPs stuff instead of patiently waiting for her to get back to me.

Poor Devin. He's been the prey of the nagging; I've been the hawk. Before the words even come out of my mouth, I am prodded by what I'm almost certain is the Holy Spirit "Don't go there Marie. That's nagging...no.....don't say it! You'll regret it.....d'oh. Too late." I don't think the Holy Spirit channels Bart Simpson, but you get the idea.

So what is it with the controlling thing? Why do I want control so much? I guess there are lots of reasons:

So other people will perceive me as having it altogether or being dependable
Because I always think I'm right....
Because it feels good to get my way?

I don't know. I just know that I need some help. I reallllllllly don't want to be like this mom who called into Dave Ramsey today. Her adult daughter was in a lot of debt and the daughter was completely inept at handling any decision making. The mom was calling all the creditors, negotiating everything, etc. etc. When Dave asked where her husband was the mom said "Oh I've basically been in charge of this household for the past 23 years." I thought that was really sad. There wasn't any partnership. She was the helicopter mom who always saved the day but coddled her child. The dad basically ignored her and let her do whatever.

No one likes a micro-manager. There's no trust there. I need to do a better job of trusting those around me and having patience. I need to remember "apart from me you can do NOTHING" and that ultimately God is in control and it's not always about me me me all the time. I need to let my daughter feel some sense of pride in choosing her own clothes and brushing her own hair. I need to be more respectful of Devin.

Anyway, thanks for reading. Do you like being a control freak too?

Prayers appreciated

2010-08-05T05:46:00.000-07:00

Hey Everyone,
Devin's mom (Roz) is in ICU at Walter Reed (Washington DC). She just had surgery to remove a benign tumor on her brain. This is something that we have known about for several months. The doctors aren't sure how long it has been there (could have been years), but it was starting to cause sinus problems, headaches and other problems. The surgery went great on Tuesday, and she is doing well now. The biggest prayer requests I believe we have at this point are

- That she'll continue to recover without any complications
-That the "taste and smell" nerve was not severed during surgery (I guess this happens 9 out of 10 times) Don (Devin's dad) said she ate some soup yesterday and liked it, so hopefully that is a good sign.

I apologize for my horrible lack of details, but God knows all that stuff. Just lift her up in prayer please!

She'll be in the ICU for one more night, then recovery room for 4-5 days, then she'll be home.

I just had to include an excerpt from Don's email, that nearly brought me to tears:

I will stay with her again tonight (recliner, pillow, and blanket) to just help keep watch on her -- I can help notice her symptoms, translate her moans, hold her hand, rub her arms, and pray. She enjoyed listening to Bible reading this morning (especially Psalm 91). Will also be able to wake up with her on our anniversary - and look out the window towards the Chapel (just a hundred yards away from her room) where we were married 32 years ago. A speciall treat!

He is such a loving husband.

Blueberry Oat Muffins

2010-08-04T12:34:00.000-07:00

I bought 5 lbs of blueberries at Hen House on Monday and have been thinking of ways to use them. I really like making these muffins because they are healthy and hearty enough to eat for breakfast along with a hard boiled egg or something. I craved hard boiled eggs when I was pregnant with Ainsley. Isn't that gross?

I found this recipe a long time ago on a blog, and I apologize that I don't remember which one. Please don't sue me for copyright infringement!

Blueberry Oat Muffins

1 c. oats
1 c. whole wheat flour
1/2 cup sugar
3 tsp. baking powder
1/4 tsp. salt
1 egg
1 egg white (I just used two eggs)
1 c. milk (I used 1%)
2 T. butter, melted
1 tsp. grated lemon peel (optional)
1 tsp. vanilla extract
1 c. fresh or frozen blueberries (do not thaw before adding to batter)

Topping:
1/2 c. oats
2 T. brown sugar
1 T. butter, softened

In a bowl, combine the first five ingredients. In another bowl combine the egg, egg white, milk, butter, lemon peel, and vanilla; mix well. Add to dry ingredients just until moistened. Fold in berries. Pour batter in muffin tray. Combine topping ingredients and sprinkle over batter. Bake at 400 degrees for 20-22 minutes or until top is lightly browned and springs back when lightly touched. Cool five minutes.

Note: Last time my batter seemed overly thick, so I added in some unsweetened applesauce. It made these muffins a little sweeter and a little more moist. I have no idea how much I put in; just kind of threw some in there.

Enjoy.

Two peas in a pod

2010-07-31T20:46:00.001-07:00

I haven't done any laundry in, oh, two weeks. Addison had run out of clean underwear, so she was wearing bloomers today (which she apparently liked better than underwear because she refused to take them off), all of my shirts were dirty except for the ones that needed to be ironed, and I was down to the uncomfortable underwear in the drawer. We had a bbq to go to today so I ironed a shirt, threw on the horrible underwear and went to the party.

I see my wonderful friend Brenda and notice she looks adorable in a cute little top and jean skirt. When I told her she looked cute, she proceeds to tell me she really needs to do laundry and how she was down to nice shirts and that last pair of underwear, the ones you never really like to wear. I started laughing and said "um yes I do know because I'm wearing mine right now!"

Ahhh so nice to have someone you can relate to.

What IS that?!

2010-07-21T07:33:00.000-07:00

So I'm looking at the Hy-vee ad trying to decide what to make for dinner (by the way when I told Devin about e-mealz he said "isn't that what you already do?" Um yes...that's whole point! I hate it!) and Addison says "Mom look at all this mess!!" I looked over to the carpet and there was a big pile of what looked like sand.

"Oh honey that is probably sand from the sandbox that is from one of your cups or something" I told her, and go back to what I'm doing. She was playing with her tea party set, and they take that outside a lot. It was a reasonable assumption.

All of a sudden Ainsley rounds the corner, out of the kitchen with a plastic measuring scoop filled...with something.

It is not sand. It is LITTER from the litterbox!

And a collective "ewwwwww" was heard from living rooms and offices around the country.

Devin's 30th and e-mealz???

2010-07-19T20:23:00.000-07:00

I truly detest planning out meals. I know it is the best option for saving money and for avoiding the whole "oh dear Lord it's 5:00 and I have nothing for dinner" situation, but I hate it. I hate making decisions, I hate combing through the recipes, and going through the sales flyers. I hate trying to figure out if all of those meals is going to leave us with only $20 of grocery money for the next week. It all stinks. I wish I was Oprah and could just hire a healthy chef like Bob what's his face. No that's not right. Bob's her trainer. That Art guy was her chef. He was on Top Chef and had the cute southern accent...........I digress.....

Have any of you used E-mealz? Dave Ramsey always plays those commercials on his show, and it sounds kind of nice. They give you a list of ingredients and you go buy everything.

Here's my issue with that:
I kind of like to buy healthy stuff, not really kale and flaxseed healthy, but you know...decently healthy.

I don't really like being told what to do, even if I've chosen the person or program myself. Would I just have to deal with that? I am sure the answer is yes!! You'll have to comment and tell me what you think...

Anyway, Devin's 30th birthday was today. I have been trying for weeks to figure out what he'd like. Getting Devin to tell you his opinion on anything is very difficult (google "phlegmatic"), but he did say that he didn't want a party. Addison really couldn't figure that one out. "When's dad's birthday party going to be?" she kept asking me.

My mom and dad watched the girls for us overnight Saturday so we could go out. We started out with coffee and then went over to the plaza, but it was just so miserably hot out that we didn't stay there very long. We looked pretty ridiculous walking around in 100 degree weather holding coffee cups! Had some Houlihans for dinner and rented a movie. Before we went home I convinced Devin to participate in one of my all-time favorite activities: drive around cute neighborhoods and pretend like we can buy houses there! He objected at first because Devin is very practical and isn't much of a visionary, but I promised him that I would not go home and immediately beg him to move out of the Shawnee ghetto just yet. I think he got into it a little bit. He and I talked about what was an absolute must for our next place and what didn't really matter all that much.

Then we went home and watched Invictus, which I was positively dreading. It ended up being much better than I thought. Still would have preferred Valentine's Day but it was his birthday celebration not mine. Our original idea was to go out to the movie theater, but the only movie playing was Inception and neither of us thought we were intelligent enough for that one.

There's not really much money in the ol' budget for birthday gifts right now, but I was so excited when my boss handed me a check from Gap Inc for back pay that I was owed. Yippeee! I decided to use it to buy Dev a K-State cycling Jersey. I was so excited about my big surprise until he told me that he saw a deposit in our checking account and emails from the cycling store and put two and two together. :( At least he didn't know it was a K-State one, and it was really cute to see him take it out of the bag and try it on right away over his work clothes. My mom made him a cookies 'n cream ice cream cake complete with 30 candles. All in all, I think he felt special and that is what matters the most.

Happy Birthday Devin! I love you!

For Rach, From Ainsley

2010-07-13T23:04:00.000-07:00

Dear Aunt Rachel,
Your life might change a lot when you have one of me.
I sure do like to get into stuff. I like to climb too.

I also make a big fat mess when I eat. My mom thinks cleaning spaghetti sauce out of the carpet is a real pain in the...well...you know...

Your house might look a little different after you have one of me. My mom spent the whole day cleaning the house yesterday, but now it looks like this:

But my mom doesn't get too stressed. She knows a fun day of playing with my sister and me was worth it.

My mom wanted to me to tell you that she's sorry she had to cut your conversation short earlier this afternoon. My sister locked our keys in the car at the mall and my mom had to call roadside assistance. Sometimes those kinds of things happen when you have a couple of me. Don't tell her I told you, but these kinds of things happen to my mom more than other moms. She is a little scatterbrained...

I am really not trying to scare you, Aunt Rachel. I might make my mom a little crazy sometimes, but I make her laugh a lot too. In fact, I think I make her laugh and smile more than I make her crazy. My sister makes her smile too. My mom thinks we are worth the messes, roadside assistance, and the spaghetti sauce stains. She thinks having kids really does change everything, but it teaches you how to love in a way you never thought was possible.

I think you are going to be a very good mom too, Aunt Rachel, and my mom wanted me to tell you that you can call her whenever you need some encouragement along the journey.

Love,
Ainsley

Adventures in Triathlons

2010-07-13T21:57:00.000-07:00

Ha! Me in a triathlon! That is funny! Really funny...I don't even know how to swim in a straight line.

Devin signed up for the Shawnee Mission Park Triathlon that was this past Sunday. Being the dutiful, ever-supportive wife that I am, I decided to bring the girls to cheer him on. I haven't had the best luck doing this in the past. Either parking is too complicated (KC Marathon) or the girls get bored and tired and fussy (Jackon County Triathlon last year) or my timing is way off (always). Then there's that whole Marie has no sense of direction and can't read a map thing. Anyway, since I've been on the receiving end of this and know firsthand how amazing it feels to see your family cheering you on when you're running, I really wanted to go. I thought we'd go cheer him on for a bit, and then head to church to help in the nursery.

I'm so good. I pack the girls some breakfast for on the go. I get their outfits ready THE NIGHT BEFORE and even pack a spare outfit for each of them in case they want to put their feet in the lake and get too wet. I even got up early instead of pretending like we can all be out the door in 15 minutes, which is unfortunately the norm for me.

Mishap #1 Woke up to cat puke all over the carpet. Lovely.
Mishap #2: Realized in the car that Addison never went to the bathroom that morning. There are porta potties there, but trying to keep Ainsley from touching everything while keeping Addison from falling in the freakishly deep poop ravine. No way. Quick stop at the gas station.

I pull in to Shawnee Mission Park thinking "Yipppeeee! We've got plenty of time! And it's not that hot out! Yes!"

Then I see that we have a good mile to walk, downhill. That means the return trip will be uphill with my piece of crap double stroller. I hate my double stroller. The tray fell off a long time ago and it's bulky and heavy. But it carries two kids. Oh well. We've got plenty of time.

We get to a place were we can see the cyclists go by and start to wait. It was cute to see Addison and Ainsley clapping for all the other competitors. It was also cute to see the man waiting next to me for his wife to ride by, pulling his kids in a wagon, obviously a very proud husband. We're all happily waiting and cheering.

Then we see some flashes of lightning and some staff come running in to announce that they're calling it all off. The proud husband and I start yelling at them. He yells "but she trained for months for this thing!" I yell, in typical Dave Ramsey fashion "but my husband paid eighty bucks for this thing!!!" We get some kind of lecture of safety....bla bla bla....have to keep all the contestant safe...bla bla bla....

Anyway just then Devin came riding up. He was pretty disappointed, but Devin never really gets that upset about anything for very long.

Then the skies opened and it started to POUR! He rides away to get his stuff and I am left to push that blasted stroller up that friggin' hill in the pouring rain. Everyone else starts to cut through the grass, so I do the same. I had to make Addison get out and walk. She started to cry (Ainsley's already whimpering). I said "let's pretend we're dancing in the rain!" That doesn't work. Then I promise her hot chocolate from Starbucks. BINGO! I am trying my best to maintain a positive "isn't this so fun?!" kind of attitude, but it's not easy with my clothes completely drenched and stuck to my body in a most unappealing way and mascara dripping down my face, pushing that stupid stroller up the dang hill. At least I was getting some exercise. Since they stagger the starting times, you usually have people leaving these things at different times as well, but since it got called off and since it was pouring, every single person was trying to get out of there at the same time. From the same road. It was crazy.

I managed to get the girls changed into their dry clothes, convince Addison that Ovaltine at Grammy's house is even better than Starbucks because it will have marshmallows, and we headed to my parents' house so I could throw my sopping clothes in the dryer before going over to church.

So now Devin is gearing up for the Kansas City Marathon in October. He did the half last year and is wanting to do all 26.2 miles this year. I have no doubt that he'll do well and you can bet that we'll be there to cheer him on. Shenanigans and all.

I'M STILL HERE! I PROMISE!

2010-07-05T13:19:00.000-07:00

Oh my goodness it has been such a long time since I've blogged. I have been SO BUSY these last few months. Where do I even begin?!

Over Memorial Day weekend I went to St. Louis with some of the coffee talk girls. It was probably one of the best trips I've ever had in my whole life. First off, I didn't have to take care of the kids, so even if we had taken a trip to Carthage, MO to see Civil War reenactments (I tried to think of one of the most boring places you could go) it would have been a blast. The whole time I kept saying "This is so fun!" or "How fun is this right now?!" and got some stares like "Uhh you don't get out much do you Marie..." I know they all agreed with me; I just like to tell everyone when I'm having fun (or not). We drank lots of wine, ate frozen yogurt for dinner one night, went to the movies, did everything spontaneously, and enjoyed being together. Oh and 4 of us got nose piercings!

The next day I drove down to Wichita with Em and Kelly and threw a surprise baby shower for Rach with her sister-in-law Katie. I told Donita to tell Rach that it was just going to be family and maybe some ladies from church. She showed up and saw us! I wish we could have been together longer, but it was so good to catch up and see her cute little pregnant bump before she and Brandon headed off to Florida.

Then, the next day after that we went to D.C. to see Devin's dad retire from the ARMY after nearly 40 years of service. It was amazing to see all the Rileys' friends and family that traveled from really far away to be there for such an important day. Old high school buddies, an 89 year old Uncle, his mom and siblings, all his kids and grandchildren, etc. etc. I can't imagine how wonderful it must have felt for him to accomplish something so huge and then see all the faces of your support systems through the years congratulating you. It is almost like a little glimpse of heaven. Heyyyy...kinda like the LOST season finale (which I loved by the way)!! I digress....

We arrived home and then had a good visit from Aunt Shel. She and my mom threw a cute princess party for Addison's 4th birthday. Devin and I bought Addison her first bike. When we wheeled it out Ainsley was as excited as Addison was, and Addison was nice enough to let Ainsley try it out first.

Aunt Shel made the cake and did a great job. The girls decorated princess crowns and played princess games and had lots of fun. While she was here, we also shopped for a bridesmaid dress for me and flower girl dresses for Darren and Amanda's wedding in Colorado which was coming up that next weekend. These next pictures were taken at the Kansas City Toy and Miniature Museum near the plaza. I love being with my mom and aunt.

A couple days later we took off for Buena Vista, Colorado to be in Darren and Amanda's wedding at Spring Canyon. My camera is a real piece, so I didn't take any pictures, but I am hoping to steal my sister in law's from facebook when she gets around to posting them...hint...hint...

Ainsley is almost 17 months old and is SO DIFFERENT from Addison! It just blows me away. She doesn't like any of her toys and would much rather play with Addison's stuff, she loves entertaining people, she's LOUD and silly, and gets into everything, and I see lots and lots and lots of time outs in her future. I also see a lot of laughs.

I'll post more about our Colorado trip and our crazy adventure home another time, but I am so happy to be home. This week I did nothing but read Breaking Dawn (you can go ahead and add me to the list of Twi-moms who let their house and kids go so they can do nothing but read Twilight books). It was shameful, really. Instead of feeding Ainsley cereal, I stuck her in a high chair with a bowl of dry cheerios and a cup of milk so she could feed herself. Addison stayed in her pajamas all day (I did too). The girls weren't complaing though. They had a blast running through the sprinkler in the backyard, although I will admit that Ainsley was stark naked (except for her crocs) while I read my book. I also went to the Eclipse midnight showing with some friends and had such a fun time.

Well that's enough blogging for one day! More to come...

Life, Life, Life

2010-05-14T11:49:00.000-07:00

I received this cute wreath in the mail from Abbe yesterday. Isn't it pretty? She sent it because I shared our debt story on her blog a week or so ago. You can read it here if you want. I would highly recommend adding her blog to your list. She is such a gifted writer and always encourages me and inspires me. I know Abbe because Rachel and Amanda used to go to her for haircuts. She did Amanda's wedding hair.

The last couple of days haven't been so easy. My close friend's mom just passed away yesterday of Pancreatic Cancer. I haven't experienced a death in many years and it was just very difficult to watch my friend lose her mom. I was torn between gratefulness that my mom is perfectly healthy and agony because I love my friend so much and hated to see her endure something so painful. It just blows. She was one of the people I wrote that poem for.

The last few weeks have kept me busy writing a portion of a grant for the College of Southern Idaho. After I turned in all 36ish pages, I was told that the college doesn't have enough of a match to be a good candidate. Even though it was a technical issue and had nothing to do with what I turned in, I still only got half the amount of money that I had been expecting. It was such a bummer to find out that the schools that I had become so familiar with won't be getting the equipment to help them out. I was still grateful to have a nice chunk of cash to throw at our debt snowball....WHICH IS ALMOST FINISHED until a nice visit to Meineke today, in which they told me that I will be using half that money to pay for car repairs.

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

So it looks like it's still going to be awhile on this debt payoff. It's ok. I'm disappointed, but I'm not angry. I'm not going to be defeated. Today I am choosing joy. There are so many good things in my life, so like Amanda just did, I will go ahead and list them:

1. We had the money to pay for the car repair and didn't have to use our emergency fund
2. My mom is healthy and we see each other all the time. In fact, she's going to pick up my car-less self and take me to her place tonight.
3. Ainsley can say "baaa" when you ask her what a lamb says. Yes she may say that for all the other animals as well, but that's alright.
4. It's a beautiful day outside today, so walking home from the car place wasn't all that terrible. Addison got tired of walking, so she held Ainsley in her lap in the umbrella stroller.
5. They didn't squeal and fight sitting together in the umbrella stroller!
6. Addison can make herself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
7. I found an adorable dress at Target for only $10 w/ cute shoes to match for $20 (Next post: ridding yourself of unnecessary guilt for buying said shoes)
8. Devin's work sent him to VA for business the same weekend his brother is graduating from Virginia Tech. He'll get to see his dad as well as see his brother graduate! And his company paid the airfare!

Thanks God for all the good things in my life, and give me the strength to choose joy. Please wrap Your arms around my sweet friend Alicia, and comfort her. Help me to be a good friend to her and never take the time I have with my mom(s) forgranted again. Tell her mom to tell my grandmas hi up there, and that Addison and Ainsley win in the "cutest grandkid" argument that they're having.

Mother's Day 5K

2010-05-10T22:42:00.000-07:00

This was such a fun race. I have to say that I truly enjoyed participating in it. I was super nervous the night before, and right before the race. The unknown is always a scary thing, isn't it? There was also the coffee dilemma. Do I drink it for energy and risk having to....you know..... or not? I had some. It was fine. Phew!

Some of my other friends signed up as well, but I accidentally ran into Kelly in the parking lot, so we started out together. We may or may not have snickered at a cheesy middle aged lady doing warm up aerobics to iTunes in the starting line. Kelly, my amazing single-mom friend, deserves some major shoutouts. She trained for the 5k on her lunch break every day because that was the only time she had to exercise. Is that amazing or what?

Devin was really sweet. He dragged the girls out of bed at the crack of dawn to come and watch me run. It was really fun to see him at different times during the race, and it helped encourage me to keep going.

Finished the race in 32:39, 10:31 minute mile. I was very pleased with these results. In all my practicing, the fastest I was ever able to go was 11 minutes per mile. My ultimate goal was to finish the darn thing without stopping, and I was able to do that. It was truly a great feeling. We got really cute little shirts and I wore mine proudly to church, like a big dork. My ultimate plan was to stop at Starbucks immediately after and get a dark cherry mocha, but I opted for one at Panera instead. Blagh. Not the same.

Thanks for all your encouragement! Before I even started running I thought "oh 3 miles. That's easy!" Then I started and that thinking changed to "there's no way I'll ever be able to do that" considering I could only go for 1 minute without getting tired and having to stop. Running for 30-40 minutes just seemed impossible.

I guess with my grant writing endeavor and this 5k, 2010 was the year for taking on some new challenges. For someone who only likes to do things that she knows she can do really, really well, this was a big deal. Totally worth it.

This last one has nothing to do with running; it's just Addison being so cute. I guess Roxie and Huck needed to be cozier. Roxy even has a beanie baby.

The friend of one who is hurting

2010-05-04T20:37:00.000-07:00

Some of my friends and family are hurting right now. This was on my mind as I was driving home tonight...

I wish you knew that when you're hurting, I'm hurting too.
I wish you knew that when I don't know what to say, it's because I see the pain in your eyes or hear it in your voice, and no words seem right. I end up making a joke because that's what I do---I make jokes or say inappropriate things. In some weird way, I hope it helps ease the pain for a moment.
I want you to feel joy, not because I want you to pretend you're not hurting, but because I don't want you to have to feel sad anymore.
I want you to know that when I bring you food or watch your kids or offer to do some other trivial thing, it's me saying "I want your pain to go away, and I'd do anything to make that happen, even for a second."
I want you to know that you're on my mind all the time. Whenever I hear a song play on the radio that is fitting, I want you to hear it, but making you a mixed cd seems sort of cheesy. Besides, what if you don't like the same songs I like? What if you think it's weird to hear "Wonderful World" by James Morrison? I mean, it's not exactly insspirational. It just seems fitting for what you're going through.
Sometimes I think life just sucks, but I know that God is good. I know that God can take away your pain and give you hope, but I don't want to tell you that because I don't want to get all churchy and flowery on you. I don't want to, in any way, diminish the hurt. I don't want to placate you with pat answers.
Sometimes hearing "God is good. All the time!" when you're knee deep in a pile of "you know" is flat out condescending.
At the same time, I know the sovereignty and goodness of God is truth. He is going to get you through this. He is going to be your rock. He is going to show you that if you will let Him.
It's crippling to know that I can't do anything to make things easier.
In some strange way, God is showing me that there is one thing that I can do that is more important than any other thing: I can pray for you.
I know, I know...it sounds trite. It's what we Christians say to each other, isn't it?
I want you to know that when I pray for you, my heart is pleading on your behalf that God will take some of the pain away; to give you some hope, even if it just means getting through the day.
I hope you know that.
In the meantime, I'm still here. I'm here if you want to talk about it. I'm here if you want to talk about something else--anything else. Lord knows I watch enough television. We can talk about that.
But in the silences that come in between talking about those other things, I hope you feel how much I love you. And I'm here through this whole journey.

Love,
Marie

P.S. As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.
As the rain and the snow
come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,
so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.
You will go out in joey
and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills
will burst into song before you,
and all the trees of the field
will clap their hands.
Instead of the thornbush will grow the pine tree,
and instead of briers the myrtle will grow.
This will be for the Lord's renown,
for an everlasting sign, which will not be destroyed.
Isaiah 55:8-13

Cooking

2010-04-09T21:12:00.001-07:00

Some of you are really into cooking. You love trying new, complicated recipes, spending hours in the kitchen and even plate the food with garnishes and stuff. You might even go as far as to call yourself a "foodie." I like cooking dinner for my family, and I am enjoying teaching Addison how to cook. I even think I do a halfway decent job, but I definitely wouldn't consider it a hobby of mine. Maybe it's because I have so much going on in my life right now, but there are times (nightly) where I just dread going in that kitchen to make dinner. It doesn't help that evening time is usually death hour in this household, and hearing Addison say "What are we having mom? I don't like that! I don't want that!" before she's even tasted it certainly doesn't help. Then there's Ainsley, and the endless task of keeping her out of the pantry. or the litterbox. or the toilet, or trying to get in and out of the fridge before she can get her grubby little fingers around the salad dressings. All that to say cooking is not my most favorite thing right now.

Having said that, the thing that makes cooking worth it, besides hearing Addison say "I LOVE THIS DINNER, MOM!", is thinking of all of you guys when I'm looking through my recipe book, getting ready to make something you posted, emailed, or made for me when we were together. Whenever I make spice pancakes, I think of Brenda. Whenever I make white chili I think of Roz, chicken divan casserole aka "heaven in a 9x13", I think of my mom. We've been eating those sweet potato fries for years, but Em changed my whole world when she posted a recipe for them with coriander. Tonight for dinner I made Chicken Succotash and it made me think of Keri. I could go on...and on...and on.

So next time you post a recipe, thinking no one really cares, know that I might be trying it out and thinking of you and appreciating having you in my life while I do, even if I accidentally burn it to a crisp, or in the case of Amanda's peasant bread, leave it raw on the inside. ;)

Poor Jamie

2010-03-27T10:40:00.001-07:00

I watched Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution last night. It was a great show. You can google it if you want more info about what the show's about, but his basic idea was to change what public school students in West Virginia are being fed for breakfast and lunch and make it HEALTHY!

The students were served pizza and chocolate or strawberry milk for BREAKFAST! Then, for lunch, they had chicken nuggets, some fruit cocktail, more flavored milk, some bread and some fake mashed potatoes. It was all frozen, pre-cooked, loaded with chemicals and preservatives, and oils and sugars.

Jamie only had three days to prepare his own meals. On the first day the kids were to choose between what he prepared (a marinated roasted chicken leg, salad, and brown rice) and the frozen pizza option that had been served before. Part of his success was measured by if the kids liked the food or not.

As much as we all hoped the kids would salivate for that roasted chicken leg and salad, SURPRISE! they picked the pizza.

"Hey Addison would you rather have some steamed asparagus or some chicken nuggets from McDonalds?"

DUH!

This stuff takes time. Kids have to get used to eating healthy. It's not going to happen in three days. These kids are accustomed to only eating foods jam packed with fats and sugars. Their little bodies probably don't even know what to do with a fresh vegetable. You should have seen how upset they were when he only gave them white milk to drink.

This show is pretty fascinating. I'm intrigued!

My own redemption story

2010-03-19T21:41:00.000-07:00

DISCLAIMER: This is a novel. I'm sorry, but not that sorry because I feel a thousand times better after writing it. Thanks!

I'm so sorry I've been absent for so long blog friends! Honestly, the past few weeks have been kind of...weird for me. I've been going through a lot, but it's all been internal. I've basically been taking a internal journey back to the past; not to my happy childhood or wonderful college years, but to the years that stunk the worst: high school. I don't really know what started it. Maybe it was going to Natasha's dad's funeral and thinking about my relationships with my mom and dad. Maybe it was the women's retreat which was extremely emotional. I think most of it has to do with this book called Boundaries that I've been reading.

Boundaries is an outstanding book. It's jam packed with really, really helpful information about protecting yourself and your heart from hurtful people and circumstances in a healthy way. I would strongly recommend it. Anyway, there was a chapter about how your boundaries are influenced by how you were brought up. My mom is reading the book too, so we were discussing those years. I told her that I honestly only had good memories of my childhood, and I thought they did a great job raising me. Then we started talking about the two really, really hard years of my life: 16 and 17.

I knew that those were hard years for me, and I vaguely remember my mom going through depression, but I had no idea how bad she was struggling with it until we talked a few weeks ago. So those years have been on my mind a lot lately. Most of you were friends with me back then, and if you weren't, a lot of you have heard me share my stories from those years. Lots of rebellion, unhealthy relationships with boys, pot, smoking, drinking, skipping class, getting fired from Target for shoplifting, car accidents, just really shitty stuff. I'm sorry. It was. It was just a really bad time. One year was in Kansas and the other year was in Maryland. It didn't help that both of my beloved grandmothers died in the same year. Anyway I honestly don't remember a lot about those years. I have sort of blocked them out. Whenever I think about them I just see black in my mind. I remember that I never wanted to be at home. I spent a lot of time at friends' houses or just out and about. I always attributed that to normal teenage angst and hormones, but maybe it had a lot to do with my mom's depression. I don't really know, and honestly, it doesn't really matter. I guess it just helps because all this time I had thought of myself as bad, and maybe I wasn't so bad--I was just running away from painful circumstances. Part of my sanguine personality is that I don't like to dwell on sad things, so that would explain some of my "activities" as well.

Again, I don't know why all of these feelings are coming back. It could also do with good ol' facebook. Along with friends that I am thrilled to reconnect with, I have also (mistakenly) befriended people that, along with their pictures and new, changed (some not so changed) lives, bring old hurts and bad memories to the surface. I thought that it was all done and in the past, but maybe I still haven't dealt with some of this. Obviously I haven't because here I am at 28 still thinking about it again. The Bible says to guard your heart for it is the wellspring of life, so I also think it would be wise to re-think the facebook thing.

ANYWAY

The beauty in all of this is that God redeemed my life. I am so blessed because I knew God that whole time. In between sophomore and junior year was a summer at Spring Canyon where tears fell down my face as I sang Power of Your Love (which was the COOLEST song at the time; that and Lord I Lift Your Name on High), and renewed my relationship with God. Unfortunately I forgot all about Him as I stepped back into reality, and into old habits and not so great choices.

There were so many saving graces through those two hard years. God brought people in my life who knew me and loved me both for me and in spite of me. This isn't some kind roll call, but Amanda is the first person that comes to mind. We bonded over band camp freshman year, and were not the most healthy influences for each other sophomore year. I won't go into detail embarassing her, but let's just say we got into a lot of trouble together. Some of it actually makes me smile. Through all of that, though, she was my closest confidant and very, very best friend. Moving away from her after sophomore year was gut wrenchingly (is that a word?) hard. I decided to move back to Kansas and go to K-State mostly because I wanted to be near her again. :) Even though I was behaving myself quite a bit more senior year, I still enjoyed a good party (again, I'm a sanguine. We love to have a good time!). I'll never forget a conversation I had with her over the phone the summer before our first year at K-State where I was talking to her about all the fun college parties we'd go to together, and she said "Marie, I don't think I really want to do all that stuff anymore." I (think I) replied "You know what? Me either." That's a whole other post in and of itself..........
There are other wonderful friends from Leavenworth and amazing influences that year: Joey, Bill Springston, ANGELA!!! (who told me about Spring Canyon in the first place and is thus responsible for my amazing marriage to Devin), Mr. and Mrs. Dolinger (Joel's parents) etc. etc. etc. Please don't be hurt if I left you out. This is a lot to type! But very therapeautic.....

Leigh Ayn was definitely my saving grace in Maryland junior year. Leaving Amanda was SO HARD, and I was so worried I wouldn't have another kindred spirit in this new place. I met her at youth group. She was listening to the Beastie Boys and dancing around. She was kind of quirky, not in a creepy, smelly way, but like me! Cute and weird! Shortly thereafter we started making up nicknames for each other and were basically inseparable for the next two years. We were very silly, but we were also there for each other during some really dark times.

My senior year of high school was so. much. better. My friend Melissa (from middle school) moved to the area and we reconnected. I started hanging out with friends at school who were less interested in skipping class and hanging out to smoke and drink, and more interested in doing slightly more productive activites. I started working at Baby Gap and singing in madrigals. Through Melissa, I met her boyfriend Dan (the boy version of Leigh Ayn). Dan and Melissa ended up breaking up, but he and I stayed really good friends. He was such a strong influence. I am so thankful for him.

Then there's Spring Canyon. Just google it. It was my second home. I spent 6 summers there. I have amazing friendships with people that I met there (Keri, Micah, Betsy, Edi, Nat). No matter how bad things were during the school year, Spring Canyon was a clean slate. You didn't have to worry about fitting in. You were loved, except for the times you got in trouble for not helping to clean enough or for too much flirting with a certain boy named Devin Riley.

What started as a camp fling continued as a relationship. One night I was laying next to Devin (against camp rules. You know me and rules) and I shared with him about the relationships I'd had with other guys and basically just laid it all for him. Instead of saying "No thanks! I think I'll find someone better" he said "None of what you just said changes how I feel about you." I went to visit him, I mean K-State, my senior year and got to see his dorm and meet a bunch of his friends, who were in total shock that shy, introverted Devin had a girlfriend...in high school. We were all sitting in his dorm hanging out when Jeremy Krause and Mark Mittenmayer started playing guitar and Laurie Loomis (now Larson) started singing Power of Your Love.

Praise music?! In your dorm?! With your friends?! In your free time? This is amazing! I knew at that moment that I would go to K-State...no questions asked. Through Devin I met Brooke, his very hip and sophisticated friend,who was a senior willing to live in the dorms with freshmen girls to reach out to them. My very first Sunday at K-State I went to church with them, as well as a couple of girls named Marisa Spear and Heather Thomas. Brooke (along with Katie and Lindsey) decided to start a bible study in Ford Hall called coffee talk. Amanda and I lived in Moore hall. At our first "floor meeting" either Amanda or I (I can't remember) announced that we would be watching Dawson's Creek in our room every week and anyone else that wanted to, was welcome to come. A cute little blonde named Rachel Noll showed up the first time and the rest is history. A couple years later Keri decided to move to Kansas for her own Spring Canyon man, and we became roommates and best friends. I grew by leaps and bounds in my relationship with God during college years. I read the Ragamuffin Gospel and learned that God really will redeem our lives from the pit. He put so many beautiful people in my life those years. I am so truly humbled when I think about it. My wedding was such a beautiful day. All of these people that I told you about, my saving graces, were there...together. In one place! Even Jeremy, who played guitar that night in the dorms, was there playing his guitar at the ceremony.
We've seen each other through marriages, babies, exciting job ventures, but also through depression, miscarriage, divorce, infertility, death, cancer, and other really terrible tragedies. Plus the day to day, just plain hard stuff. I can't say enough how thankful I am for these friendships. It is truly how I see God's hand on me in my life.

Then there's the fam. My parents are wonderful. When I started at K-State, my dad was transferred to Italy (ARMY) and then DC, so I didn't have them around for four years. I think this time away from them really made me appreciate how much I loved them. If that didn't do the trick, having babies really makes you appreciate your parents! My mom's been in Arkansas for the last week, and it's killing me because I am used to talking to her every day. I am thankful that she open to sharing her heart with me. I love watching my dad with my girls. He is so loving and affectionate with them. It's very precious to me. I love that we talk about heart-related things now, and that our relationship is headed in a deeper direction. Same is true for me and my brother. Another family member that I've connected with by leaps and bounds is my Aunt Shel, my mom's sister. It started with her calling me when I was in the pit of dispair about being pregnant with Addison (whom I couldn't imagine life without should you learn to read anytime soon!!!! I love you my sweet girl!!!) because she understood where I was coming from when no one else did. Now we text about 13 times each day. Plus she is the only one who gets why I think it would be fun to go to Starbucks...every day.

So what's happening with me right now? I guess I am learning to "live forgiven"

Micah 7:19
Who is a God like you, who pardons sin and forgives the transgression of the remnant of his inheritance? You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy. You will again have compassion on us; you will tread our sins underfoot and hurl all our iniquities into the depths of the sea.

I don't have to feel guilt or fear when those memories come creeping up, or when I see a blast from the past on facebook or when I'm at work. God has redeemed my life. I can be Devin's wife and raise my girls with confidence that I am God's precious child, whom He loves dearly. Sometimes I live in fear because my life has been so calm (as calm as it can be with a 1 and a 3 year old running around), and relatively trouble free. I worry that God has some awful test for me right around the corner that I will have to endure. I know those are lies, and ignoring the truth and believing them is a sin, but sometimes it's hard not to think those things when you see the people you love going through such awful things. You can't help but think "when's my turn?"

(As a sidenote every time I think that I think about the scene from The Sex and the City movie where Charlotte is thinking the same thing and Carrie says "Charlotte you shit your pants this year. I think you're done." That basically has nothing to do with this except that I think that is one of the best movie lines of all time. BTW is it ok to mention Sex and the City in your testimony? I hope so. )

Honestly, though, I know that is not the way to live life. Worrying about losing my kids or my husband will rob me of the all the joy I have with them. Giving up the fears when they pop in my head is something I'm working on. That and finishing this blasted Boundaries book! I always get so excited about starting a new book and then get bored halfway through. Let's face it: The Twilight Series is a lot more fun to read. :)

Thank you for reading my story. If you finished it, you deserve a prize. Honestly, I could go on and on about God's grace in my life. I could do a whole post on Devin's family, or my first couple years of marriage. Or how hard parenting is sometimes (oh wait...I post about that all the time!), or how awesome Westside Church has been in our lives. Can the people pleasing/approval seeking/not wanting to hurt anyone's feelings side of me just say one more time please don't be upset if I didn't outright mention your name. If you're my friend or family member, you've impacted my life. Period.

Love you all. Now, no more complaining about my absence!

Next up: Blog totally devoted to my love for all things television!

So sweet

2010-03-14T21:35:00.000-07:00

I was wondering what kind of "lovie" Ainsley might become attached to as separation anxiety set in. When she was about 5 or 6 months old she went to sleep much easier with my t-shirts, but that was short lived. She does take a pacifier, but she doesn't have a favorite stuffed animal or blanket. Ainsley's "soother" is the threads that have unraveled from her Ikea crib bumper. Every time we lay her down in the crib, she strokes her crib bumper until she finds the two loose threads and then grabs them. It calms her down right away. It's so weird, but so adorable. I don't think we'll ever be able to get rid of that thing.

Copycat

2010-02-19T22:55:00.000-08:00

Addison was digging around in her kitchen tonight and coming into the living room with her special sandwich concoctions made with her plastic bread. Ainsley had been watching her and following her, and the next thing we saw was Ainsley crawling in with two plastic breads stuck together. She pulled up to the couch and handed it to me with a big smile and some baby gibberish. I mean, c'mon. Is that cute or what? She was trying to be like her big sis! Totally made my day, and made up for the fact that she was playing in the toilet (which Addison had forgotten to flush...beautiful) while I was trying to shower earlier that afternoon. And a resounding "ewwww" was heard across the country....

Anyway I have some pics from her bday to post. You'll just have to stay tuned!

artichokey goodness

2010-02-15T22:33:00.000-08:00

I asked my mom what I should make for dinner with chicken and she gave me some new recipes she wrote down awhile back. One of them was for Chicken and Artichoke Quesadillas. I'm not going to lie: they sounded completely disgusting. Mozzarella cheese? On a tortilla? Blagh! As I was writing the recipe down, though, it started to sound alright. Whatever. It's good to branch out, right?

THEY WERE SO GOOD! SOOOO GOOD! Even Devin, who is normally very apathetic about what he is eating, said "Hey, this is good!" That translates into "this is the most delicious thing I have ever eaten in my life!! I can hardly stand it!!" in case you were wondering.

Try some.
1 cup cooked chicken, chopped
1 can artichokes (14 oz), drained and chopped. I chopped them up pretty small. I don't like big chunks of artichoke on anything.
1/2 cup mayo
1/2 cup parmesan cheese, grated. (or my friend: the green can)
1 clove garlic, minced
tortillas (I used the whole wheat kind, and I think it must have canceled out the fat in the cheese and mayo. I'm sure it did.)
mozzarella cheese

Mix the chicken, artichokes, mayo, parmesan and garlic together. Spray some pam in a skillet, throw a tortilla in there and let it warm up a bit, flip it and let it get warmed up on that side. Spread the mixture on the tortilla, add some mozzarella cheese and cover with another tortilla. Cook for about two minutes on each side, until the cheese is melted.

I burned the first two and yelled for Devin to come make them because he is the quesadilla master in this family. His were perfect. It made about 4 fajita size quesadillas for us.

The recipe says to serve them with salsa, but we didn't really need anything extra.

DON'T READ THIS NEXT PART AUNT SHEL! I'M WARNING YOU!
I've been buying bone in split chicken breasts when they go on sale. I buy about 4 or 5 pounds and throw them in the slow cooker for about 3 hours on high. After they're cooked I shred up the chicken and measure about 3 cups into ziplock freezer bags and throw them in the freezer for whenever I need shredded chicken. I have loved doing this because the meat ends up tasting like rotisserie chicken meat like you get at the store, much more flavorful than boiled chicken. Split breasts go on sale for really cheap too.

My catch

2010-02-13T14:58:00.000-08:00

I banked out in the husband department. He puts up with a lot:

open cabinets and drawers (all the time)
clothes that are laundered, but sit in the laundry basket for a whole week
clothes that are unlaundered and sprawled all over the floor
"Devin I don't have a plan for dinner. How about I go to the store. You should get a snack cause it's going to be awhile."
a messy house because I would rather be with friends and family than clean
"What is Addison wearing? That shirt doesn't go with those pants!"
"No I don't know where the receipt is. "
crumbs after I make a sandwich
half-filled coffee cups lying around the living room with coffee that I forgot to drink (the Marie trademark).
"Can we go out to eat?"
"You're working this weekend again?!"

And he's still in love with me....
I'm a lucky girl!

Deep thoughts this Valentine's Day

2010-02-11T12:07:00.001-08:00

This lingerie that I was given before I got married 7 years ago just ain't right anymore. It accentuates the...unpositive. I feel like you should get another lingerie shower after you have kids and stuff is kinda droopy, maybe a little flabby, and perhaps a bit...marked. Then you'd receive stuff you might actually feel up to wearing without having to spend any money!

Then again, what would you give someone who just had a baby (and can you really say just when your kid is turning 1 on Monday? Let's go with yes!)? "Here's a fleece, zip up nightgown with Winnie the Pooh! It's guaranteed to keep you baby free for at least another two years!" or "Here, have a mu-mu!"

:::sigh::::

Sorry you had to read this post Dad. And Grandma.

Child locks are useless if they're broken

2010-02-10T21:25:00.001-08:00

::::sigh:::::

::::sigh:::: (again)

:::and notice the one dangling from her mouth and crack up laughing and grab the camera....hee hee hee!:::

Later on I was making stuffed peppers and gave Addison the job of pulling the seeds and "white stuff" out of the peppers. Look at how cute she is with that towel draped over her shoulder (just like mom and dad)!

Later on Devin and I stared at each other in shock and amazement as we watched our ultimate picky eater gobble down piece after piece of red pepper. They were some darn good stuffed peppers. I'm grateful to my Grandma Barb (deceased ten years) for the recipe.

A1 Stuffed Peppers
1/2 lb to 1 lb. ground beef or you could use lentils or quinoa if you feel adventurous and earthy.
1/4 cup chopped onion
garlic (optional)
8 oz. can tomato sauce
1 can corn
1/4 cup A1 sauce
1 cup cooked brown rice (you could use white if you don't feel like being healthy)
4-6 green or red peppers.

Preheat oven to 350

Brown beef and saute onion. Add everything else and let simmer for a few minutes. Stuff mixture in side peppers. I usually only use about 1/2 lb ground beef to make 4 good size peppers (with plenty of "filling" left over). Bake at 350 for about 35 or so minutes until the peppers are soft.

Here are a few more pics to make up for my blogging leave of absence:

Haiti

2010-01-17T14:56:00.000-08:00

One aspect of my personality that I hadn't realized until recently is that I don't like to dwell on things that aren't...happy. One of my spiritual gifts is mercy, so that probably doesn't make much sense, but maybe I can explain a little better. When something terrible happens to those I love, strangers, animals (even a deer crossing the street), it hurts me very deeply. I often have a difficult time separating myself from them in that moment. I'm there with you. If you're hurting--I'm hurting. When it comes to horrible tragedies like that horrible tsunami, hurricane Katrina and now Haiti, sometimes it's easier (ok not sometimes...all the time) to just not think about it. As a mom of two little ones it's heartwrenching to think of spending several nights roaming the streets looking for your kids (or to imagine your kids roaming the streets looking for you). So I've basically ignored the news articles and the pictures and the statistics and lived in my safe bubble of grocery shopping, playdates and activities. Anytime I've heard of people donating money I feel a brief sense of relief that people are being helped, but then I go back to my day emotionally unscathed.

Until today, when I let myself go there; let myself feel the pain of the mothers who have lost children, children who have lost parents, people who would give anything for something to drink or eat.

I know God gave me the gift of mercy for a reason, and it's not to feel sad all the time: to be some kind of pathetic martyr roaming around in sackcloth and ashes. He made me this way so I'd PRAY. and help. and care. and love. And quit thinking about me me me me me me me me day in and day out.

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.

1 Corinthians 1:3-4

Anyway, I know this isn't my usual silly kind of posting, friends; it's just what's been on my heart. Thanks for listening. I hope you know that I'm here to walk any road with you. I hope you know that even if we don't talk for weeks on end, even if we haven't seen each other in ten years, that I think about you. And care.

Love,
Marie

Observations

2010-01-14T22:28:00.001-08:00

Things I never imagined I'd be saying:

-Ainsley get away from the trash!
-Ainsley don't eat that diaper!
-Ainsley don't climb on the dishwasher!
-Ainsley we don't eat catfood!
-Ainsley quit digging in the trash!
-Diaper cream is not for eating Ainsley!
-Ainsley don't eat Huck's tail! That's not nice (don't tell the cat policewoman who monitors my site)!
-For the love of God, child, get OUT OF THE TRASH!

And she does it all with that precious, toothy grin. And yes, she's only 11 months old. I'm in some serious trouble!

Some more Ainsley facts:
-She likes pretty much all foods except for cantaloupe, but strawberries, blueberries, canned green beans, and acorn squash are her favorite. Oh, and Ritz Crackers.
-She loves hardboiled and fried eggs, but won't touch them scrambled.
-When she's about to do something bad (usually involving the stairs, trash, or cat food bowls) she takes one step or sticks one hand in, and stares at you for a reaction before proceeding.
-She already knows how to get a nice shriek out of Addison by giving that red hair a nice hard tug.
-She loves to wave and say hi. She also says "Da-Da!" when she sees Devin come in the room. It's pretty cute stuff.

Addison aka "The Sponge" has to know...everything.

"Mom, where are you going?"
"Who were you talking to? What did they say?"
"What's that in your mouth? Can I have some?"
"Where did you go?"
"What were you doing in there?"
"What are they doing? Where are their clothes?" ---uh oh. No more Grey's Anatomy in front of Addison....ever.
"Why?"
"Why?"
"Why?"
"Why?"
Oh and yes, I have resorted to "because I said so" more times than I'd like to admit.

One nice thing about having such an observant child is that she notices everything about Ainsley too, which helps when I am not so observant, like when Ainsley found my gum this morning. Truthfully Addison has had a very joyful spirit lately. Last night I made Amanda's Italian Sausage Bow-Ties and Addison said "That was a yummy dinner Mommy! Thanks for making it!!" after eating every single bite. After months and months of "I don't like that." and "I don't like this dinner." and "This dinner doesn't taste good" her little compliment made my day.

Here's a picture my friend Brenda took of us a month or so ago:

I'm so grateful the temps have climbed back up a bit. As much as I love Kansas, our weather is just the worst. 6 degrees. Ridiculous. Amanda and John drove up from Georgia last week and we had such a wonderful time together. We took one afternoon to visit Heather over at Children's Mercy. When we checked in they printed off a photo badge for Amanda but a regular one for me. I whispered obnoxiously "it's because you're Amish!" Some things never change, and Amanda is a good sport to let me embarrass her...still. Anyway, one visit a year is just not enough.

Goodnight!

First movie

2010-01-06T13:32:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago some wonderful friends and I decided to take our girls to see The Princess and the Frog. None of the girls had seen a movie in the theater before. In fact, when we were paying at the ticket desk Addison asked me if we could watch it at home. She thought we went there to buy the movie to watch on our tv. You should have seen her face as we walked into the theater with the huge screen.

It definitely wasn't on the same scale as The Little Mermaid or Cinderella, but the Princess and the Frog was a pretty great movie. It was funny (and a little sad) and had great music. There were a few scary parts, but Addison didn't seem to phased. The only issue she had was being closed up in her seat because she couldn't keep the chair down. Devin was laughing at me because when we lived in Manhattan we drove all the way to Olathe's AMC 30 to see Return of the King because Manhattan's theater was just not suitable. For this movie I picked Cinemark because it was the cheapest. ;)

Here are some pics of our little adventure:

nostalgia

2009-12-18T21:07:00.000-08:00

I love Christmas. I love everything about this time of year. I love the street not far from me that has filled their lawn and house with every kind of lawn ornament and light display known to man. I love the food, the music, the tv specials, the shopping, my 8' tall waving Santa, Devin's holiday work party that has the same food every single year (I don't think engineers believe in variety) etc. etc. etc. As much as I love this time of year, I also get a small feeling of sadness in the pit of my stomach: I miss the memories. Here are my favorites:

-Opening up one gift on Christmas eve after church. It was inevitably new pajamas.
-The first time Eric and I really got to experience snow in Hinesville, GA. We didn't own any snowpants, but we came inside and watched Gummy Bear Adventures and drank hot chocolate while our jeans were in the dryer.
-Receiving my Barbie dreamhouse with the elevator
-Bon bons and Candy cane cookies that my mom makes
-My Christmas band concerts in middle school. I felt like some serious hot stuff playing "Jingle Bells" on my clarinet in my white shirt, black jeans and cumberbund.
-Christmas Eve services at various military chapels that always ended w/ dripping candles and "Silent Night."
-Learning the alto part to Carol of the Bells in madrigals senior year and singing in Old Ellicott City (MD). Hearing that song still gives me goosebumps. I love it!
-Going sledding senior year of high school with Dan and Leigh Ayn. I'm sure if you know her like I know her, you can imagine the facial expressions and screaming noises she made going down that hill.
-Exchanging Christmas gifts with Amanda A WHOLE MONTH EARLY in college.
-Christmastime in the dorms at K-State. They always put on this fabulous Christmas dinner for us and finals week was such a fun week of celebrating.
-Junior year of college when Aunt Shel sent my gift to my house in KS. It was taped shut with "DON'T YOU DARE OPEN THIS EARLY! I KNOW HOW YOU ARE!" slathered all over in black permanant marker. You know I had that bad boy ripped open in about 30 seconds! ;)
-Driving to visit the Rileys my sr. year of high school (a few days after Christmas) to see Devin, who was home from college. I was SO excited to see him. Every now and then I look at him, and am amazed and thankful that I get to spend the rest of my life with this man who made my heart jump out of my chest.

Merry Christmas everyone!

Christmas Letter 2009

2009-12-16T21:33:00.001-08:00

Dear Family and Friends,

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. We hope this letter finds you doing well, but this letter really isn't about you is it?

Devin is still an engineer at Johnston Burkholder Associates.

Marie still stays home with the kids and works part-time at Baby Gap.

Now onto our little geniuses:

Addison, 3 (but she can tell you that herself in English AND Spanish) is growing like a weed. Devin and I are in awe at her intelligence. While most kids are just drawing scribbles at this age, Addison is able to color completely in the lines. Her attention to detail astounds us: she doesn't just draw a sun, but adds eyes and a smile as well. She spends her days composing music, practicing spatial analysis, and creating scientific hypotheses. She is in the gifted and talented program at both the gym kid's club and our church preschool. She is also becoming a talented gymnast. We are planning on hiring a personal coach to get her ready for the 2020 Olympic Games. We are proud to say that she is smarter than all of our friends' children and we let her know this on a daily basis. Because Addison is so intelligent, we hope to enroll her in 1^st grade next fall, skipping preschool and kindergarten.

While Ainsley (10 months) isn't quite as smart as Addison, she is still a delightful little baby. She barely makes a peep, only to request her daily serving of kale with flaxseed (in sign language of course). Ainsley is also in the gifted and talented program in the church nursery, and we our keeping our fingers crossed that she'll make the honor roll at our gym's kids club. She is already able to say ma ma, da da, and guh guh, so we have placed her on the waiting list at the local montessori preschool. Because her diet is so balanced, Ainsley has never spit up or had a leaky diaper. Her b.m.'s are always round and perfectly formed. Like Addison, Ainsley is outperforming her peers in all areas. We are truly proud parents.

Our strict schedules with the girls doesn't allow for much time socially, especially now that we are trying to get a head start on college applications, but let us know if you are in the area. We'd love to squeeze in some time for you (maybe).

Happy Holidays!

Warmly,

Devin, Marie, Addison and Ainsley

;)

28

2009-12-13T03:00:00.000-08:00

Ten years ago...

I was turning 18. I had already been through so much in my life at that point, and had already learned so many life lessons that I pretty much thought I had life figured out. HA!

I was already in love with Devin Riley, but also dating someone else too. Devin won. I think I made a very good decision.

I was pondering moving back to Kansas and going to K-State so I could be with Devin and Amanda, or staying in Maryland. A few months later I chose Kansas, and 9 years later, I am still happy with this decision.

I was trying to figure out what to do with my life, when deep down inside I knew all I wanted to be was a mom.

I worked at Baby Gap.

I wasn't the least bit active. Since then I have climbed 5 fourteeners, braved spin class and figured out how to run for longer than 3 minutes without wanting to die.

I considered myself a really good singer. Now the only people I sing to are my two little girls, and my repetoire includes songs like "Ba ba ba ba...thank you God for baby Jesus."

I was meeting Devin's family for the very first time. I sat on the couch and watched the Disney Channel with Daniel and Caitlyn. When I returned home from the trip I told my mom that I wanted to be part of that family.

I was more interested in hanging out with my friends than my parents. Now my parents are my friends.

I loved to make people laugh and have a great time. Still true.

I discovered The Cheesecake Factory.

I was late to just about everything and trying to figure out how to not be. I used to stop at Dunkin Donuts and get coffee for my 1st period teacher so she'd excuse me for being tardy. Maybe I'll have this figured out by birthday #38.

I had two piercings in each ear. Since then I've had an eyebrow ring and my first tattoo.

I felt God's whispers of love and grace, even though I had no room for him in my life. I'm so thankful for a God that forgives all things.

Those are my memories. What do you remember the most about me through the years?

Addison's Art

2009-12-04T21:43:00.001-08:00

I'm sure lots of other kids drew boobs on their good samaritan pictures too and not just my daughter, right? Maybe? Hopefully? Please!

Please pray!!!!

2009-12-04T18:47:00.001-08:00

My friend Angela from high school and Spring Canyon (she's actually the one who told me about Spring Canyon in the first place) just gave birth to a beautiful little girl, Ally. She was born October 12 with a cleft lip and palate. Here are some of the status updates I've seen on facebook:

"As you may or may not know, our daughter Ally was born with a cleft lip and palate. Tomorrow we head up to Great Falls for her first surgery. Tomorrow afternoon we have her pre-op appointment and the surgery first thing Tuesday. It is fairly major surgery and Ally will be under general anesthesia. We would appreciate more than we could ever say prayers for her safety and for the wisdom of her doctors."

She already had one surgery, but the stitches came out and the repair work disintegrated. She had another surgery at around 2 pm.

Please lift up Angela, Nathan, Ally and their two little guys. Pray for complete and TOTAL healing for little Ally.

Update from facebook:

Success!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! God is so good!!! And God bless Dr. Santin!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's all so clear now!

2009-11-23T12:03:00.001-08:00

Today at mops this lady came and talked about the personalities. I will admit that my first thought was "Again? I already know all about that stuff." She presented it in a completely new and cool way. I learned a lot. I learned more about me and why I have so many issues, I learned about Devin and his issues, I learned about Addison and her issues, and I learned about Ainsley (maybe) and her future issues?! Just kidding. Have you ever heard the phrases Sanguine, Choleric, Melancholy, and Phlegmatic? Google some of those words and try to figure out what yours is. I'm sanguine. Is this surprising? No. It's not surprising at all. I just wish I had known this stuff earlier on. Sanguines LOVE to have FUN! We are open books, will tell you anything, tell on ourselves, stretch the truth, will choose fun over responsibility, and desire approval from others above anything else. We're constantly running late, love to shop, and love to give, give, give. Sanguines struggle with organization more than any other type.

Why did I major in Elementary Education? Could somebody please TELL ME??!!!! Now it makes sense why during my student teaching I just wanted to get in there and teach those kids and why I would get horrible stomach aches just thinking about planning lessons. Why I would get migraines because I was so worried I'd fail. It explains why subbing was ten times easier for me. I could show up, have a great time with the kids, carry out someone else's plans and then go home.

It explains why, if I do something stupid, I put it up on facebook and then don't understand why everyone else doesn't do the same thing. It explains why (if I don't learn to control myself) I might be that 80 year old woman who is telling her great grandchildren or the lady on the bus all about her constipation. Hee hee hee.

It explains why I'm typing this blog instead of making a dent in the laundry. The speaker did say that we shouldn't use our type as an excuse for bad behavior....

Anyway now that I know so much more about who I am I feel so free to be me: someone who loves relationships and having a great time, being silly, bringing joy. God made me that way. I just need to work on some of that other stuff. Like laundry and housework (even if it is just not very fun).

I think Addison is melancholy. I'm already seeing some perfectionist tendencies and she's VERY sensitive. She's also really into drawing and art and music. Oh and God forbid you change her daily routine. I can't wait to see how this develops in her.

Devin is phlegmatic. He is Mr. even keeled. Doesn't get too excited about something, but doesn't get too upset about something either. Phlegmatics tend to be procrastinators and a bit on the lazy side unless they are super excited about something. I'm laughing as I type this because it is just so dead on. It explains why I'm jumping around the living room saying "Devviiiin let's do something FUN! Come on! Let's play a game!" and he just looks at me with tired eyes and wants to watch Monk or go to bed or read his book. Phlegmatics desire peace. They like to sit and watch.

As for Ainsley I think she's turning out to be more like me, a little entertainer. It's probably too soon to tell, but it sure is fun seeing her personality erupt lately. 9 months is a FUN age!

What are you? What are your strengths? Weaknesses?

Update

2009-11-22T20:29:00.001-08:00

This was a great weekend! Yesterday I took Addison to gymnastics and she went right in without throwing any fits at all. Last week was an entirely different story...

Then I went over to Kohl's and scored some awesome deals on some things for Ainsley and a pair of jeans for Addison.

After that I decided to peel my lazy butt from the computer chair and go for a run. It had been a week and I was definitely not in a running mood, but I knew I'd feel great if I just went for it. I accidentally ran 3 miles total. So incredibly difficult. By the end I was literally yelling at myself. Thankfully no one was around to hear me. I thought I had only gone two until I came home and told Devin the trail I ran on. He said it was 3. Well that explains why it was so hard. As many of you know I am NOT an athletic person by any means. I never participated in any sports growing up and am not talented in this area. It feels so good to have started this seemingly impossible goal and see progress. It's also scary too. It is scary for me to do things I know I won't be instantly good at, or to try things when I could possibly fail. Yikes. That is why I know I need to keep trying to do this.

ANYWAY

Today Devin and I worked in the nursery with the 1 year old cuties. As much as I love holding itty bitty babies, I am in love with this age group. They're so loveable and cuddly and hilarious too. Then Kelly brought Elise up to church and joined us. It was fun to have them there with us.

Later on in the afternoon I went to a shower for Merah. She's pregnant with their third baby--a boy! She announced that they are considering moving back to Cayman. I was trying very had to be supportive, but inside I was thinking "NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Please don't take my Merah, my first ever mom friend in Kansas City." Ouch. That would be a tough loss. First Rach moved away and I'm hearing rumors of other friends leaving too. Nope. Not thinking about it right now! Denial...la la la la la.... I think the reason my wedding was such an amazing time was because I had all of my friends and family in one spot, and we all had so much fun together.

Anyway this is going to be a great week. Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays. Plus my new tradition is to go to CVS at midnight the night before to get the black friday deals. Will you be joining me via cell phone this year Leigh Ayn? My parents and Devin were discussing what we were going to eat that day and I was naming off the usuals:

Turkey (duh)...check.
Stuffing...check.
Mashed Potatoes...check.
Corn Casserole... Mom: "Well I was thinking about not making that this year" which was received by looks of horror from Devin and me and a "WHAT?!" from my dad. "We have to have corn casserole!" he said. My mom argued that it was too similar to stuffing and mashed potatoes. That just wasn't a good enough reason. I replied "I could make it."
"Have you ever made it before?" asks my dad.
"No, but if Eric can make it I can make it (no offense Eric!)."
"Well make it for Devin first and if he says it's ok then you can make it." There are some things you play around with, but corn casserole stays on the menu and that's that.

Oh and I broke out the Christmas music early this year. It started with Josh Groban's Little Drummer Boy and took a steep curve downhill with Amy Grant's Christmas album from 1983 that I found at the library. Oh so many childhood memories from that one. Once I broke out Mariah Carey's Christmas cd there was no turning back. So far Addison's favorite song is Sleigh Ride. It reminds me of dancing around my dorm room with Amanda to the Billy Gilman and Charlotte Church version. Yeah this one:

Happy Monday!

Dave Ramsey knows how to get under your skin

2009-11-18T09:31:00.000-08:00

and I think that's why he takes calls like this:

Yesterday two people called in to the show separately telling Dave that their elderly parents had nothing, but were receiving calls from collectors from a pile of credit card debt. One lady was in a medicare nursing home at the end of her life and was still plagued with credit card collectors. Dave asked if she had any assets and her daughter said "nothing. she has nothing." Another man called saying his 74 year old father-in-law was living with them, receiving $683 a month in social security and had $30,000 in credit card debt. This is so SAD! You've raised children, worked hard, and then at the end of it all have nothing to show for it. I guess that's not such a big deal because having stuff isn't what life is all about. The thing that breaks my heart is the debt. I know how it feels to be trapped under a bunch of debt. It feels hopeless, so to have all that debt on top of the assets that you DON'T have is just so, so sad.

Anyway that was a bit of a downer so here are a couple of cute things that Addison has been saying lately:

"Mom is that that Christmas man?" (after seeing a picture of Santa hanging up in CVS)

"Huck's going to drive Roxy to the mall?!" (after mis-hearing me say "Huck is driving Roxy up the wall")

"Hey that's the man that screams all the time!" (about Bruno on Dancing With the Stars)

:)

How about a little balance?

2009-11-07T20:25:00.000-08:00

Are you sick and tired of hearing about food this and food that? I am. It's become a new obsession for a lot of people, and a way for us moms to try and outdo each other. Enough with the scare tactics. Let's all take a deep breath and enjoy a Snickers. But just one. Not five. I was browsing around on the internet, trying to help poor Heather figure out how to get Goldfish cracker stains out of her daughter's shirt (I was curious too) and I stumbled on yet another message board about healthy eating. I don't know who this person is, but I thought what she had to say was pretty interesting. I'd love to hear your thoughts.

"Now, let us travel deep in the land of my personal opinion: we all need to lighten up on the food issues. I was raised in a tofu, all-natural, nothing-out-of-a-box, whole-wheat, chip-and-soda free environment deepinthehearta Berkeley. I'd go to school and watch the other kids eating their ding-dongs, or their sandwiches made with Skippy (I, of course, had the all natural peanut butter from the Co-Op; you know, the kind that rips the bread when you spread it and leaves an oily stain on the lunch bag), while I ate my stale sandwich and all-natural fig bar. Oh, I could have cookies (made with honey), and candy (one piece, after hallowe'en), and my family was not morally opposed to dessert, but for a kid, it was a pretty miserable life.

I'm 41, and I've now discovered there were a lot of us 60's babies out there whose parents were doin' the all-natural thing in an attempt to promote healthy eating habits. I've also since discovered that it's we 60's babies that have the biggest food issues.

At 12, I used my allowance to buy Capn Crunch that I would store in my closet in my room (I was not alone in this behavior, I later discovered). At 16, I would go to those geeky evening parties, and spend the entire night at the snack table --alond with all the other kids who were deprived such treats -- devouring the jello blox, filling our pockets with pretzels and chips, and scooping that salty onion dip into our mouths. By the way, the kids who had the Ding Dongs in their lunch boxes? They were dancing and talking.

In college, I developed an eating disorder. There were a lot of reasons for that, I'm sure, but when I finally got help in a group setting, I discovered a lot of people, whose food choices had been strictly proscribed, were right there with me.

Now, I meet fellow ''granola-babies'' all the time and we laugh at what our parents tried to do and how badly it backfired. Sometimes it's not so funny.

I cringe when I go to the park and hear parents talking about the dietary constraints they have laid on their kids. I don't want my child to eat cheesy fries, either, and a can of chili poured into a bag of corn chips is not my idea of a protein-rich diet. Accordingly, I have no problem telling my kid NO if he wants marshmallow creme for dinner (I'm not afraid of a little crying); he'll eat what I serve. If his nanny was serving him orange soda instead of milk, I'd give her exactly one chance to stop feeding that crap to him. At the same time, I would try to temper my desire to expose my son to a healthy lifestyle with a little realism, and allow him to experiment. It wouldn't change my behavior at home, where his diet is fiber, vitamin and protein rich, but I not going to focus too much attention on it. -- Tsan"

NOTE:

This post is not passively aggressively directed at any of you, I promise. At my mops group a few weeks ago we had a speaker come in to teach us all about healthy eating for our children. Instead of giving us helpful hints or fun ways of getting your stubborn, redheaded child to eat vegetables she literally said things like "if you give your child Skippy peanut butter you might as well give them sugary lard." We all left feeling like the worst mothers in the world. Anyway, so when I stumbled upon that post on a message board it resonated with me. Hope that helps to clarify things a bit!

Helpful Hint

2009-11-03T22:36:00.000-08:00

When you go to a late night showing of This Is It with your aunt, it might be a good idea to double check the theater (to make positively sure you're the only ones in the room) before attempting the Thriller dance, doing twirls and leaps in front of the screen on your way back from a bathroom break, and singing at the top of your lungs. Yes, it may appear to be empty, but there might be one old guy in the waaaaay back who comes walking down the steps after the movie's over (after you've made a complete fool out of yourself). If you don't get my helpful hint in time, at least you had a great time doing it.

heh heh.

You should have seen the "oh crap" look on our faces when he came walking down.

Stages of a Starbucks gift card

2009-10-28T19:59:00.000-07:00

I got a $25 Starbucks gift card for gambling at www.enjoytheriderewards.com The nice thing is I was gambling with points for watching videos and taking polls. Can't beat that.

Every time I receive a gift card to Starbucks the following stages always take place. The length of each stage varies depending on how much the card is worth.

I waited in anticipation for that card like you wouldn't believe. I checked the mail everyday, hoping that today would be the day Dave (my mailman) put my little piece of plastic happiness in our mailbox. Stage one began the day after it arrived. Stage one involves being so excited about the giftcard that you drive 4 miles out of your way to immediately go use it. It also involves sharing the coffee goodness with everyone, even your two year old daughter. Drinks for everyone! Yippee!

During stage two you get a little more greedy. No more drinks for the toddler. "Addison you can have water in a special cup with a lid and a straw! Won't that be fun?!" You might order a tall drink instead of a grande to make it go a little farther.

When stage three comes around you start to think "hmm..I better watch my calories. Three drinks in three days is kind of a lot" and order a non-fat, sugar free vanilla latte instead of a caramel macchiato. It's not nearly as good, but still better than drip coffee at home.

Stage four is a bit of a downer. It's when you look at your receipt and see that you only have $4__ left on the card. Time to make a choice: one espresso drink for one more trip or two regular coffees spread out into two trips? One really satisfying last hurrah or two delicious, yet semi-satisfying cups of coffee? It's a toss up.

Stage five is just downright depressing. It's when Starbucks sounds really good and you think about making a trip, and then realize that your gift card is all used up. Sometimes you dig around in your wallet or in your husband's change jar. Other times you sigh, turn on your own coffee maker, and long for your birthday, when another Starbucks gift card will make trips to Target, the park, church, work, and just about any other place that much more exciting.

Note: The stages are exactly the same with a Caribou Coffee gift card.

Yeah you...

2009-10-20T18:49:00.000-07:00

This is for all of my latest and greatest "anonymous comment leavers." I'm all for a little healthy criticism every now and then, and don't mind one single bit if you disagree with my post and want to tell why, however, to post a rude comment anonymously and high tail it out of there is laaaaaaame. I may have some issues, but at least I put myself out there. Sometimes it bites me in the butt, but I am who I am. Take it or leave it. But if you don't want to take it, read someone else's blog instead of leaving your crappy incognito comments on mine.

I love Aunt Shel!

I do what I can...

2009-10-18T21:13:00.001-07:00

Adventures at Baby Gap

One of our managers is a cutie patootie named TJ. TJ knows all the words to all the Miley Cyrus and Jonas Brothers and Taylor Swift songs that play in the store, wears vanilla scented lotion, and is one of those people that brightens your day just by being around him. I'm about 5 years older than TJ and even though he is one of my bosses, I tend to mother him a bit. Last night was no exception. When I got to work he was whining and jumping around and saying he was going to kill himself because he had a piece of popcorn kernel stuck in his teeth and it was driving him nuts. Hey, we've all been there. I suggested every thing I could think of to get that thing out, but nothing was working. I went and washed my hands and said "TJ let's go to the backroom. I'll help you out."

One flashlight, one plastic fork, and one mom who is grossed out by very little later, the kernel was gone.

Sometimes I think I should bring a camera to work.

Splurges

2009-10-15T16:12:00.001-07:00

You all know Devin and I have been Dave Ramseying it for three years now, and we've been on a budget this whole time. On moneysavingmom.com she listed her splurges and I thought it would be fun to list mine!

1. Coffee-mate creamer: We always, ALWAYS have it in the house. It's a sad day in my book when one of us uses the last drop and we have to use skim milk in our coffee. My favorite flavor is chocolate raspberry. YUM! Yes, I've put this on the debit card when we've run out of grocery money!

2. My hair. I lived here for a whole year and spent practically nothing with a "rising star" stylist at Dillard's salon and HATED my hair. Then one day I found Jessica, the girl who used to cut my hair at Crimpers in Manhattan. Hallelujah! She has been cutting it every 8 weeks ever since and there's no way I'm leaving her. She does a great job. I will curl up in a ball and die if she moves away.

3. DVR. We welcomed him in the family when we paid off our credit cards last year and I'm officially hooked. There have been a couple of times I've told Devin that it can go when things were looking a little tight, but secretly I was thinking "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! PLEASE! ANYTHING BUT THAT!" I would probably put internet in this category too.

4. Our little slush fund. It's $60 a month of happiness. It goes towards Starbucks, eating out, movies, etc. It's just a little bit to keep moving forward on this budget.

5. 24 hour fitness. Our gym memberships are dirt cheap ($45 per month for both of us including childcare), and it's so worth it!

What are your splurges?

Poor, poor Huck

2009-10-12T19:13:00.000-07:00

Our poor kitten gets carried around daily, squeezed, squished, thrown, febreezed, its fur cut with toddler scissors, and now pushed around in Addison's babydoll stroller. Yet, he still likes to do this:

A little tip

2009-10-12T10:35:00.000-07:00

This kind of a no-brainer, but I thought I'd throw it out there. I have a pair of slouchy brown suede boots that are my FAVORITE boots to wear. They look really cute with tights and a skirt, jeans, cords, everything. I bought them two years ago at DSW for only around $30 or so. After being used as "snow boots" a couple winters ago (I'm an idiot) and out and around town last year they took a pretty harsh beating. A lot of the dye had worn off and they were generally in bad shape. I figured I'd just have to shell out the $$ for a new pair. Kelly paid me to watch Elise for a couple of days so I thought I'd use the money for new boots. The problem was there were so many other things I needed that money for and new boots were low on the financial totem pole. Plus I really, really liked them! Slouchy boots are really popular this season and they're so comfy! I hated the idea of throwing them out.

Then I remembered how obsessed I am with shoe repair places. I go there all the time! When my favorite strappy sandals from Italy broke I got them repaired. I even had the heels shortened on my cowboy boots because I was pregnant and they were too tall. I took my poor distressed boots to a place nearby and $10 later they were looking awesome! They don't look brand new, but pretty darn close. Anyway that's my tip for you guys. Kind of lame, but hopefully helpful. That's what I'm here for.

Do you like my new blog look? I was supposed to be googling stuff on Old Testament Prayer for our small group, but I spent two hours re-doing my blog. BAD! That scrapblog is one big black hole....

Good Day

2009-10-11T19:46:00.000-07:00

Saturday was kind of crappy because we had to spend the entire day vacuuming, cleaning, washing anything that might have flea particles on it, but today was a great day!

I went for my first non-treadmill run in many, many years. My iPod died as soon as I started, but the peace and quiet was good for me. I don't have any peace and quiet in my life because I like to talk so much! The run was harder than anything I've done in a long time, but it was beautiful outside. It felt so good to accomplish something that was so difficult. There are people that have a lot of inner drive, but I tend to get excited about something and then forget about it after a little while (especially if I can't do it perfectly right away). I'd love any tips from you runners out there.

Then we relaxed and relaxed and relaxed and I watched Shark Tank and Grey's Anatomy re-runs. Perfect!

Jeni came over and took some wonderful pics of our family. I haven't seen any of the pictures, but I am positive she did an amazing job. The girls were working that camera like nothing I'd ever seen. I will admit that we bribed Addison by telling her she could rent any movie she wanted from the redbox when we were done if she did a good job. I asked her if she liked Jeni and she later said "Yes, she was berry nice."

The night ended with a yummy roasted chicken and pumpkin pie dinner (with red AND white wine) at my parents' house. Mmmmmmmmm.

Oh and it's flea free and CLEAN around these parts! Just in case you were worried about stopping by!

ugh

2009-10-09T21:33:00.000-07:00

I was playing around with blog layouts and I messed up my whole blog!! I don't feel like fixing it right now, but no, this ugliness won't be around forever!

Current crisis: FLEAS

GROSS! Roxy has never had a single flea. Huck was covered in them when he came to our house. I found like 9 fleas on him his first night here. The adoption lady told me that they had given him a treatment and everything should clear up in a few days. Today I found two more fleas on him. Well I found one and Addison found the other. I called my vet that very instant and went to pick up some medicine for him and Roxy ($90). Now I'm just so grossed out! By the time I got the medicine and a new filter for my vacuum to increase its flea sucking power, and we ate dinner it was already 9:15 and too late to do all the deep cleaning. So now I'm sitting here, feeling really itchy and flea-ish, wishing I had paid for a nice purebred, flea-free, Siamese cat from the breeder and not this little fleabag.

I'm sleeping on the couch tonight. I did get a chance to vacuum the heck out of that thing.

GROSS!

I read that Borax works great when sprinkled in your carpets and stuff. Have any of you earthy people ever heard of diatomaceous earth?

Tomorrow is cleaning day.

A Lesson on Forgiveness

2009-10-08T10:20:00.000-07:00

Saw this on this blog.

Toward the end of Sunday service, the Minister asked, "How many of you have forgiven your enemies?"

80% held up their hands.

The Minister then repeated his question.

All responded this time, except one small elderly lady.

"Mrs. Neely?; Are you not willing to forgive your enemies?"

"I don't have any." She replied, smiling sweetly.

"Mrs. Neely, that is very unusual. How old are you?"

"Ninety-eight." she replied.

"Oh, Mrs. Neely, would you please come down in front & tell us all how a person can live ninety-eight years & not have an enemy in the world?"

The little sweetheart of a lady tottered down the aisle, faced the congregation, and said:

"I've outlived them bitches."

Mentor

2009-10-06T21:42:00.000-07:00

Do you have one? I've got lots. I love spending time with people. My love language is Quality Time, which is why my house is always so danged messy and the laundry is never done. I'd rather go meet a friend, hang out with my mom, chat on the phone with far away friends/family, or take the girls to the park ANY DAY than do housework or errands. ANYWAY I have been in a Life group with our church for about 4 years now, and recently the women of the group started meeting once a month to do a bible study. My favorite part about this group of ladies is that we're all different ages: 60s, 50s, 40s, 30s, 20s. I'm the youngest of the group and thus have the most to learn, but I like to think that I help the older ladies understand their children better. I also like to think that what I lack in insight, I make up for in entertainment value! I just got back from one of our monthly meetings. We were there talking for four hours. It was truly wonderful. I received some jaw droppingly (is that a word? ) good advice, learned more about God, and felt loved. I guess my point is that you should go find a mentor. Whether it's your mom, mother in law, aunt, slightly older or much older friends, go find someone to help walk you through life. I have tons of them so if you don't have one, I'll lend you one of mine. Who is your mentor? Do you have lots like me or is there one person in particular that sticks out in your mind?

P.S. I am finding a good balance with my love for people/laundry pile situation (at least until I can afford to hire a housekeeper). We go out a couple times a week and stay home a couple times a week. That seems to work pretty well.

Family Update

2009-10-04T12:06:00.000-07:00

If you need a good laugh read the other post I put up today. Here are some pics of the Riley fam:

Here is Devin from his first triathlon last month in Lee's Summit. He's a stud in yellow.

Here is Roxy with our adorable new cat Huck. After lots of hissing and cat growling, Roxy has finally accepted Huck as her new BFF. Huck is sort of weird in that he begs for people food. It doesn't matter if we're eating cereal or green beans, he's there begging and eating up the crumbs.

When Devin was working late last week I took too long at the grocery store and both Ainsley and Addison were starving. I let Addison feed Ainsley a bottle while I got dinner going.

It only lasted a few minutes until I had to resort to this (Ainsley in swing with bottle propped up with Boppy). Just send that mom of the year award to my home address!

This is Addison with one of her bff's 'Vannah (Savannah) and Savannah's brother Luke.

This is Ainsley's first time in the race car cart at Lowe's.

This is from our yummy anniversary dinner at the Cheesecake Factory.

Ainsley just started crawling and is now pulling up to get stuff. I suffered through her colicky stage because I knew there would be a time when she'd happily sit on a blanket and play with a toy. That beautiful stage only lasted a couple of weeks. She is crawling all over the house and getting into everything. This is the face she makes when we try to tell her no. It's really hard not to laugh!

Poor Roxy. Her social status in our household keeps getting lower and lower.

Here's big sis. She's so grown up now.

Another one bites the dust

2009-10-04T11:18:00.001-07:00

I have been a fan of What Not To Wear with Stacy and Clinton since the show began and it was Stacy with some other long haired bearded guy. They always have some weirdo on there that can't part with an outdated clothing item, hideous hairstyle, or something that doesn't fit properly. I always watch these freaks and think "What the heck? It's a _____. It looks ugly. Let it go." Well I've discovered that it's easier to say that to other people and their ugly junk than it is to say that to myself and my ugly junk. Case in point: my beloved green Eddie Bauer sweater. I bought this beauty with my mom nearly 5 years ago. It was the only non-pleated, non- turtlenecked (I usually look like a midg...err.. little person in turtlenecks) item on the clearance rack and so she bought it to give to me for Christmas. I wore it all the time and must not have washed it correctly, because it keeps getting shorter. And shorter. And shorter. Yesterday I tried my beloved sweater on for Devin and he said it was too short to wear. I asked him if it might be ok with a white button down hanging out. Nope too short still. Darn. BTW If any of you are needing a male opinion on your outfit, hair, etc. and need someone to give it to you straight (no sugarcoating) give my husband a call. He says it like it is (he has learned for said opinion to be asked for FIRST after 10 years of being my significant other).

Anyway the sweater is going bye bye. Maybe someone with a shorter torso (if that's even possible) will get some use out of it at the Goodwill Store.

Just in case you haven't laughed today:

For a friend

2009-09-24T06:30:00.001-07:00

This is dedicated to Natasha who needs something pee your pants funny to laugh at. Nat, I hope this does the trick!

Hot pink reminder

2009-09-22T21:01:00.000-07:00

Addison loves to have her nails painted. She's so cute about showing them off to everyone and choosing sandals to highlight her newly painted feet. The only problem is that every single time I try to paint them something happens. Something spills, or she smears it on my pants, or on the carpet. The other day she begged me to paint them and frankly the dirt under her toenails was kind of grossing me out (no one wants to be the mom of the "dirty kid" at the 24 hour fitness kids club, not even me). I sat her in her little chair, set the polish out of the way a little and got started. Well miss squirmy pants got a little too excited and kicked over the pink nailpolish. I flipped out. FLIPPED OUT! As a mom you know when you've gone too far with yelling, and I totally did. It would be one thing if that only happened once in a blue moon and every other incident you are June Cleaver. I'm not. More often than not I'm Mr. Hyde if Mr. Hyde was a pale, out of shape, housewife still in his pajamas at 12:00 in the afternoon.

I watched Dr. Phil today (just the icing on the cake of my little analogy up there!) and it was about a dad who was too tough on his son. The little boy was 9, afraid of his father and was already growing to resent him. Addison knows how much I love her now, and is quick to bounce back NOW, but how long will that last? How many times will I blow up at her for spilling something or drawing on the couch or cutting the cat's hair (ok that one was kind of funny) or whatever it is that makes me blow a fuse before she starts to resent me? Or maybe it won't get to be that bad, but to the point where she'll know I'm not serious until I start screaming. That Dr. Phil show was a really good wake up call for me.

The beautiful thing about all of this is it's not too late AND I don't have to conquer this on my own. Let's face it: I suck at doing it on my own!

2 Corinthians 12:9-10
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Anyway, I never was able to get out that hot pink nail polish stain. I tried all types of things: nail polish remover, hydrogen peroxide, window cleaner (don't laugh...that's what about.com said to try!!). I am sure I inhaled some delightfully toxic fumes, but there is still a faint pink mark there. I have to say that I'm even a little ok with that. Not just because our carpet doesn't mean that much to me (which it doesn't), but that it will serve as a little reminder of how I totally over-reacted and how I so desperately want to change.

Thanks for your support and love! Now I'm off to watch 18 Kids and Counting. Michelle Duggar never yells.

Love/Hate

2009-09-06T19:35:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I don't like Dave Ramsey. It's nothing against him; he's a wonderful person. It's the plan. I know, I know...in the long run it'll be good. But right now, it's stealing all the fun and making me mad!

It's stealing time with my husband because he now chooses to work on all the holidays.
It's making me mad that I have to wear my same old clothes day in and day out.
It's making me mad that my pillows have stains on them and my lampshades don't match.
It's making me feel like a big 'ol mooch every time we do something with my parents because they have to pay because we don't have money for it.
It's making me mad because I'm TIRED OF EVERYTHING ALWAYS BEING ABOUT MONEY (or lack thereof).
It's making me mad because we're so close, yet so far away from the goal of being debt free.

We've been at this for three years in October. I get asked a lot if we ever get discouraged.

YES!

Ok that feels better now. Thanks for letting me vent.

And now for something that always, always cheers me up:

Gets me every time

2009-08-28T16:07:00.000-07:00

I was scrolling through cake wrecks feeling a little disappointed that it wasn't as funny as usual until I found this post. Please read her comments.

Happy Birthday Mom!

2009-08-26T21:52:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is my wonderful mom's birthday! There are so many wonderful things that I just love about her. Here are some of my faves:

-Quality time is her love language. It's mine too. Basically we spend a lot of time together. It's really, really nice.

-She isn't afraid to say what she feels, yet can say things in a very loving (but still non passive aggressive) way.

-She doesn't get her feelings hurt very easily, and is quick to forgive.

-She loves the Lord more than just about anyone I've ever met. Her relationship with God is constantly growing, shifting and changing (in a good way).

-"Renee-isms": spiritual anecdotes. My top faves in this category are "I saw a bird and I thought of God" and "Changing a poopy diaper is just like God forgiving our sin."

-Our shared love for Barry Manilow. We don't like a lot of the same music. She balked at all of my suggestions for her iPod (c'mon who wouldn't want to work out to Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch?), but we love to sing along to "Daybreak."

-My mom doesn't step on our toes when it comes to parenting the girls, but she does see to it that Addison's hair is nicely combed and her face is wiped off.

-She's the only person I know who watches c span. :)

-She cares deeply for her friends and treats them like family. We have shared many holiday meals with friends. Everyone is always welcome .

-She loves my dad, and not out of duty or obligation. She really, really loves him and deeply respects him.

-She treats Devin just like her own son. She actually treats him better than she treats me. "Oh Devin... are you washing the dishes again?" This is something I've openly complained about, but secretly like. She's always supported our relationship, from the very beginning.

-She was a fantastic parent (you were too Dad, but this post is about mom and I didn't think about doing this on your birthday. Sorry. There's always next year!) She let us make mistakes, even though I'm sure it was really, really hard not to swoop down and protect us from them. She prayed for us like crazy (and still does).

-She makes a big deal out of birthdays and holidays with fun decorations and little presents. Even though I don't get an Easter basket anymore (sigh) I will always have wonderful memories of holidays that we celebrated as a family.

-She's done more for me than I can count. When we were moving out of our apartment in Mission and I was a hot, frazzled mess, my mom drove two hours from Ft. Riley to help me re-paint. She has also canceled plans with friends to be with me when I'm having a hard time with the girls.

I love you very much Mom and hope you have a great day.

Crazy details

2009-08-21T22:09:00.000-07:00

Remember how I bought that Palm Centro to help me stay organized with everything happening in my life? Not happening! I continue to try to keep all these dates and times in my head. Well there are so many details in there I think I am going to explode! I hate being busy. I am so not cut out for the life of a soccer mom. I think I'll quit while I'm ahead (ahead meaning I do not own a minivan or have a child that plays soccer).

We're back to me emailing Devin my work schedule and then asking him on a regular basis when I work again. We're also back to forgetting birthdays and anniversaries.

Time for a fresh start!

I'm such a mess. It's a good thing God loves me despite of my, um, issues!

Target is a black hole

2009-08-20T13:28:00.000-07:00

I went in there for a Swiffer Wetjet and some watercolor paint for Addison. As I walked through I remembered that I needed to gather some stuff to make a meal for a friend. Threw it in. Then I thought I would make the same meal for us tonight. Threw that in too. Then I saw coffee creamer on sale. In the cart it went. Then the gum on clearance. Then Addison started doing the potty dance. I quickly grabbed some stuff from frozen and headed to the front. Better grab that Swiffer Wetjet. Uh oh....30% off clearance section. Let's just stop for a sec. What? Oxyclean for half off?! Joy! Now Addison is really dancing. Better hurry. Let her go in by herself while I stay outside with Ainsley. "Moooooom! I can't get out!" Leave Ainsley, run in, figure out how to talk Addison through opening the door. She's holding her skirt in her hands. Ok wash hands. Thank God the sink is low enough to reach. I tell Addison to sit on the floor and put her own skirt on. "Here Ainsley, chew on this pack of gum." Ok checkout! WAIT! THE PAINT! Uh oh better grab a pack of cd's to save pictures on. Roz has been asking for that for months now. "Hmmm pack of 50 for $9.99 or pack of 5 for $3.49. Ok, pack of 50, pack of 50...!" No paint in office supply section. We head to the back of the store where school supplies is. Ainsley is now screaming. Addison sees toys and starts to run away "ADDISON YOU GET OVER HERE OR I WILL LEAVE THIS STORE WITHOUT BUYING PAINT!" Everyone stares at me, but Addison begins walking backwards back towards me. Still no watercolors to be found. What's this? 10 bottles of washable paint. Check the price. $4.99. Fine. We'll get that.

Check out.

"Moo-ooom I'm hungry and thirsty! I'm hungry and thirsty!" Ainsley is still crying. Ok. Buy kid's meal: pb&j, yogurt, icee. Only $2. Nice. Ham sandwich on wheat for me. Flip over the back of the pb&j package. Holy crap! 310 calories! Addison drinks half her cherry icee and then cries because she wants blue instead. "Too bad! You picked red!" I try to nurse Ainsley in the booth with a small blanket. Every so often she yanks the blanket off and I flash whoever is in checkout. We finish eating.

I just cannot muster the energy to go to Aldi to buy the rest of the stuff for the meal.

Round 2!
Ainsley is holding Addison's leftover yogurt tube. Grab bagged salads...yes! They're on sale for $1.29. Phew! Go to back (again), get mozzerella cheese... Hmm...2% or regular? 2% or regular? 2%! Buy overpriced baby yogurt for Ainsley. What a ripoff, but maybe it'll help her gain some weight. Ainsley proceeds to spill yogurt all over herself. Get out wipes, she's screaming because I took her "toy" away. Wipe everything up. Better grab baby food for her too. Head back to baby section. They're out of the brown rice cereal I like to get.

We finally, finally checkout (again) and head home.

I never want to go shopping again.

The view from my window

2009-08-18T16:27:00.000-07:00

Some people look outside their window and see this:

This is what we see:

Jealous?

___________________________________________________________________

On another, less disturbing note, Addison, Ainsley and I just returned from Arizona. We had a great time visiting relatives in Phoenix and our family cabin in Greer. Even with my parents' help, traveling with the kids for a week without Devin was no joke. I'm exhausted!

Where's a Duggar when you need her?

2009-08-10T20:55:00.000-07:00

I hate packing. Hate it, hate it, hate it. The thing I hate most about packing are all of the decisions that you have to make. What should I wear? What's the weather going to be like? What are we going to be doing? How should I wear my hair? Should I bring stuff for curly hair or stuff for straight hair or both (I never said I was low maintenance)? When you have kids you have to make these decisions three times. Then there are my suitcases. I either have a giganto suitcase or a too small suitcase. I hate this. Help me please. I've been doing this for 3 hours. 3 hours! Who takes 3 hours to pack?! Me, apparently.

blagh.

Oh, and p.s. it's easier to give birth to a baby and bring her home then it is to adopt a cat in Kansas. Just thought I'd tell you. Apparently they had a few concerns about us. Give me a break.

Control Freak

2009-08-08T07:14:00.000-07:00

I never really thought of myself as a control freak until recently, when I started reading The Search for Significance. God has started showing me very clearly that I totally am one. Dangit! I wanted to portray myself as this laid back, easy going person. I mean, if I was perfectionist wouldn't my house be perfectly cleaned at all times? Wouldn't my flowers be perfectly weeded and pruned? Wouldn't the laundry be folded and put away instead of sitting in the baskets for three days? The truth is, like a lot of people I have this all or nothing attitude. If I can't clean my house exactly the way I want to, what's the point? If I don't have three hours to spend organizing the stuff on my desk, what's the point of tidying it up? If I can't spend the money on all the things I want to make my garden look nicer, then who cares? As for the laundry..well...that's just plain laziness!

The problem with being a perfectionist is that it doesn't just affect you. I am finding that it could eventually ruin my relationships if I don't change. It turns you into a total control freak, and to people that don't understand why you are the way you are, you come across as, well (I'm just going to say it) a total bitch. Let's take yesterday for example:

I was having a tough time with Ainsley. If she misses naps, she just gets miserable. The 20 minute catnaps just weren't cutting it for her and she was screaming. I was out with my mom and I still needed to buy some stuff for a goodbye party for Brandon and Rach (subject of another post...so sad). My mom graciously offered to go to the store for me so I could get Ainsley back to her house and calmed down a little. With all the screaming in the background, I quickly told my mom what I needed and we parted ways. She came home with a few sacks of food and other things. Instead of being grateful about what she got, I immediately started criticizing this and that (shameful, I know) because it wasn't exactly what I would have bought. If the tables were turned and I had gone shopping for her and she had reacted that way, I probably would have walked out of the house, uttering a few cusswords about ungrateful people, but my mom is a much better person than I am. She calmly explained why she bought what she did. As the afternoon progressed, things didn't get much better. My cookies didn't turn out that great. Turns out I used baking powder instead of baking soda (oops) and started to panic that no one would want to eat them. When my mom said "Marie it's not like you're entering them in the state fair!" I realized it really didn't matter either way. It also didn't matter if people didn't like the exact flavors of pop she chose.

Later on, as is common with me, I realized the error of my way and called my mom to apologize. She forgave me. People did eat the cookies (except for the 10 or so burnt ones on the bottom, which I left at Andrea's house...hee hee!) and drank almost all the pop.

My control freakness does leech out into other areas as well. God forbid Devin put Ainsley to sleep in her swing because "the book" says that's bad to do! And our roof could possibly cave in if he gives her some formula instead of the frozen breastmilk (which in his defense, is a pain to thaw). Oh, and it also could signify Armageddon if Addison's outfits don't match.

The point is I want to change! No one likes to be around people like this. They are just flat out annoying and take the fun out of everything by worrying about stupid details that don't even matter! Thankfully I'm married to a guy who doesn't put up with my crap, and I'm saved by a God who will change me if I ask for help. Any other perfectionists out there want to go on this journey with me?

Everyone's favorite Spinach Dip

2009-08-07T22:42:00.001-07:00

and I mean everyone. Here is the top secret recipe, complete with instructions:

1. Go to the grocery store, to the soup aisle

2. Buy this:

3. Flip the packet over

4. Make the recipe on the back.

:)

Happy Anniversary!

2009-08-05T13:53:00.000-07:00

Congratulations Don and Roz! This is my feeble attempt at reconciling the fact that I did not send a card....bad, bad, bad daughter-in-law. I'm sorry!

Moving on with the congratulatory stuff:

You two are such an amazing couple and have produced children that are simply wonderful. There's one boy in particular that I think is the best out of all of them, but your love for each other and Christ has clearly rubbed off on them. There are many things I admire about your marriage, but some of the most special things (to me) are:

Don, I love watching how much love you lavish on Roz. You make it clear to everyone around you that she is the love of your life by treating her so special. I love how you like to take her out to nice dinners (or cook for her sometimes), take her shopping for something special. It's not just that stuff. Anyone could take their wife out to dinner or buy her flowers. You show love in such a gentle, authentic way. It's very sweet.

Roz, I admire how much you genuinely respect Don and admire him. It shows more than you think. You always seem so proud to be his wife, and it certainly doesn't seem forced. You take good care of him by cooking meals for him, packing his lunch for him every single morning, accompanying him on trips, and most of all, supporting him through everything.

It's obvious you to would do anything for each other. Thank you for being such a great example for Devin and me. We love you so much!

Ha!

2009-08-02T23:10:00.002-07:00

Priceless conversation between my mom, my brother and me. This is not verbatim.

Me: acting very excited about winning Ticket to Ride and beating my brother and especially Devin.

Eric: Marie, I thought you of all people could care less about winning a game. I don't remember you being this competitive.

Marie: It's Devin's fault. He rubbed off on me. I love to win things now!

Mom: It's probably because you're a mom now. Having kids can lower your self esteem.

Blank looks from all around

Eric: Only if you have us for kids!

*As a side note, I did see what she meant. There are times that I miss having a career, as well as the adult interaction that came along with it. Sometimes something as small as winning a game (other than Dora dominoes or Princess Memory) can make you feel like you still have something to contribute. You may disagree, but I feel that way sometimes.

Anyway I really enjoy spending time with my little bro. He is a great conversationalist, smart (too smart), and extremely caring. We have a very similar sense of humor, which can get a tad pretentious at times (especially when aimed at one of his ex girlfriends). He is also very patient with my blatant interference in his love life (COME ON SINGLE LADIES! WHO WOULDN'T WANT ME FOR A SISTER IN LAW?!) . I wish he lived in KS, but he's getting ready to head out to DC to start his fancy new job.

Here's one more recent pic from our trip to Colorado. Caitlyn (Devin's little sis) took this picture. Addison refused to smile until Caitlyn said "Addison if you smile one more time I'll take you to the playground." Thus, the perfect smile was born. What a little stinker...

Cheap Dipes

2009-08-01T11:57:00.000-07:00

I ordered some diapers off of diapers.com today. It was an awesome deal! I got a 228 pack of size 2 pampers and a 42 pack of luvs for $40.97 w/ free shipping. At Sam's I would have paid $39.50 for a 264 pack of size 1-2 (Huggies), but I wasn't sure how much longer Ainsley would be in that size AND I like Pampers/Luvs better. Parents Choice and Target brand are still cheaper, but I decided the $5 extra was worth it for Pampers. I used a referral code to get $10 off. Because I just bought from them you could use this code: LITT7995. You can also send in manufacturer coupons ahead of time and they credit your account. Then, when you're ready to buy, they take them off automatically. Anyway, I'm not sure how often I'll use this site. I only tried it because of the $10 off and free shipping. Kind of nice to have diapers delivered to your house though!

I'm still semi-interested in trying cloth. We have a Bum Genius diaper that Ainsley looks so cute in, but I can't quite get Devin on board to shell out all that money upfront. Plus the laundry.... I am always behind on laundry as it that it is hard to imagine washing a load of diapers every single day on top of that. Ainsley goes through 10 a day. YIKES! But yes, I'm thinking about it...

Here are a couple of pics of these cute blocks that Keri made for the girls

Oh, and here's Ainsley NOT napping. Yes that's my shirt. She likes to sleep with it (normally).

Stranger Danger?

2009-07-31T12:24:00.001-07:00

Apparently reading the Berenstein Bear book about Strangers is not really doing the trick with Addison. Today it was such a beautiful day outside (hello! 78 degrees....in July....in Kansas) that we had a picnic lunch at a nearby park. Addison immediately ran over to the nearest parent helping her kid on the slide and said "Hi! I'm Addison!" Then she did it again to two more adults. It takes her a little bit longer with other kids, but she usually says hi and plays with them. Today some elementary aged girls were playing and one said hi to Addison. Addison said "Just a minute! I need to get something!" She sprinted over to the blanket where I was sitting with Ainsley and started digging through my purse. Out came an empty sandwich bag! She ran over to the little girl and said "We can play catch the bag!!!" Unfortunately "catch the bag" did not sound as delightful to Addison's new friend, and Addison's excitement was met with a blank stare Oh well. "A" for effort right?

In napping news (which makes for an oh so thrilling post) I am willing to put my intense need to get out of the house on a daily basis on the back burner for awhile if it means Ainsley can get the rest she needs. Plus I am enjoying the extra time I have to read books and play games with Addison. I enjoyed Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child very much. Thanks for the suggestion Carmen, Em and Erica! I wish I had read it when Addison was little. Oh well. She survived.

Nap City

2009-07-29T11:36:00.001-07:00

I finally received my copy of Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child from the library. As I was perusing through it, I saw the action plan for babies 5-12 months old. Apparently they are supposed to wake up at 7:00, nap at 9:00, nap at 1:00, possibly nap at 5:00, and go to bed at 7. That's all fine and good, but when the heck am I supposed to go to the grocery store or take Addison to play with her friends? Why does it all have to be so complicated? I do like the book a lot though. This guy knows his sleep stuff.

MMMMMMM

2009-07-27T17:02:00.000-07:00

When we were in the Springs Keri made this really good dinner. I copied the recipe down and made it tonight. Since it's so easy, cheap and GOOD I thought I would share it with you.

Chicken Succotash from Rachael Ray (we'll just pretend it comes from someone less annoying who doesn't shorten the words to everything, and who doesn't name her own brand of dog food a dumb name like Nutrish)

2 T butter
1 bunch scallions, white and green parts thinly sliced separately
salt and pepper
one 10 ox box frozen corn
1 cup frozen lima beans, thawed
1 cup heavy cream
21/2 cups shredded rotisserie chicken (Keri and I poach chicken breasts in broth and it turns out very tasty)
1 tomato, chopped

In a large skillet, melt the butter over medium heat. Add the scallion whites, season with salt and pepper and cook, stirring for two minutes. Add the corn, lima beans and cream and bring to a boil. Stir in the chicken and cook, stirring occasionally, until the sauce is thickened, 4 to 5 min. Stir in the tomato and scallion greens just before serving.

I couldn't find lima beans at Hy-vee, so I just bought a bag of frozen veggies and thawed them in the microwave a little bit. They worked just fine.

We served them over biscuits. Keri made hers, but I bought the kind in a tube. Before I went to the store I thought I'd try to make them from scratch to save money. I got there and they were only $1.08. Heck yeah baby!!!

You know this dinner is good when Devin said "This is good!" while eating it (refer to this post: http://blessedimperfection.blogspot.com/2009/06/hellooooo-friday.html

Sharks are mean

2009-07-24T11:37:00.001-07:00

Check out my friend Julia's blog.

Why didn't I think of this?

2009-07-23T15:22:00.000-07:00

Patrick Largen posted this on facebook and I thought it was too priceless not to post on my blog. I guess there's always my vow renewals. Then again, can you really see Devin doing this? I'm gonna go with a big fat no!

This post is dedicated to Jules, who literally got bit by a shark and needs a pick me up. No one likes to dance as much as she does.

Picnic

2009-07-23T10:08:00.000-07:00

Addison hosted a picnic for giraffe and her baby doll named Pablo, Tyrone, Riley or 2 (depending on the day). Here are some things I overheard during their picnic:

"Dear God, we love you. Thank you for our trip. Thank you for Uncle Eric's house and Aunt Caitlyn's house. Amen."

"Don't kick her! You're going in timeout!"

"You hit BJ and you hit kitty! You're going in timeout!"

"Do you need help eating your food?"

"Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh!" (when she spilled the plate)

Devin Riley, PE

2009-07-11T10:40:00.000-07:00

Here are some pictures from Devin's PE (professional engineer license) ceremony in Topeka

My parents came as well, and they took us to Granite City for dinner afterward! Yum!

Karaoke Time

2009-07-11T09:39:00.000-07:00

This is how Addison decided to wake Ainsley up from her nap (to her credit, Ainsley was already awake). Thanks for the karaoke machine Grammy. Maybe we'll bring it back to your house! :)

Funny Moments

2009-07-07T20:54:00.000-07:00

Last night Devin was working late. I brushed Addison's teeth and then let her finish while I checked email/facebook until it was time to read her a story. I never heard anything from her, so about 10 minutes later, I went to check on her thinking she'd be downstairs playing or something. Nope. She is in her bed, fast asleep.

Today we were changing to get ready for the pool. As I'm putting my swimsuit on, Addison says "ewwww!" I look around to see what could possibly be disgusting her so. Oh, it's me. My naked body is deserving of an "ewwww." Guess that means it's time for me to hit the treadmill again. It's also time to have that talk about what is appropriate to say outloud.

Farewell. You've served me well.

2009-07-03T20:04:00.001-07:00

This post is dedicated to my favorite jeans.

I bought these jeans at J-Crew 4 years ago. It was love at first try-on. They were the perfect jeans: tight at first, but not too tight. Low rise, but not too low. Plenty of room in the waist, but no sag-butt. Plus they stretched out just right after you wore them for a few hours. I wore them as long as I could until I couldn't make them work with my Addison pregnant body. Then, many, many, many months later I was able to squeeze back into them. It was a moment of joy to be able to wear those jeans again. They were badly torn on the bottom from being dragged under my shoe, but I kept on wearing them. Now they not only fit like a glove (well, sort of...) but they were soooo soft! I wore them as long as I could with Ainsley and then put them in my closet as my "target jeans." Well they fit now, which is great, but I came to the realization that just because something fits doesn't mean it looks good! Sure I can put them on, but the low rise look doesn't look quit as appealing as it once did. The extra room in the waist that I appreciated before now makes me look like a plumber. They keep falling underneath my post baby #2 belly. Plus I have a nice rythym going: walk two steps, hitch up pants, walk two more steps, hitch up pants. The last straw was when I was at Hy-vee in the checkout line and I mooned the cashier, two baggers, and everyone in line trying to fish Addison's chapstick from underneath the candy rack. Nope. This girl needs some nice mid-rise pants. No more low-rise jeans for me.

Yesterday Gap marked most of their jeans down to $19.99 and gave the employees half off that price (they're getting all new jeans in!). I came home from work with a new mid-rise pair of Long and Leans, telling Devin they were to replace the other ones. I tried on my tried and true J-Crew pair one more time, and felt myself getting a little sad. "Well maybe I should just keep them" I told Devin, "they don't look too bad" as I'm hitching them up for the 45,000th time. He laughed at me and reminded me that I unintentionally moon him everytime I wear those, when I'm on the carpet with the girls. Hmm. Enough said. This is how people end up on What Not To Wear with mullets, bad perms, tapered jeans, and red leather jackets. It all starts with a "well maybe it doesn't look so bad" and a husband that is too chicken to be honest. I'm glad I'm married to one who's not.

Let's just hope my new love-affair with mid-rise jeans doesn't turn into this:

Compromise

2009-07-02T07:12:00.000-07:00

Devin wants to wait til we're out of debt. Marie wants a cat right now. We'll talk in December. I realized I was putting a lot of my sadness over Gus into looking at kittens and thinking about how fun a new one would be. After our discussion/fight last night, I was putting away some stuff and found Gus' brush and it made me really sad. I had pushed down a lot of those emotions because I didn't think it was acceptable to grieve over a pet for more than a day or two. I'm still pretty sad about losing him.

Ohhhhh Devviiiiiin!

2009-07-01T11:55:00.000-07:00

This is Darla. She is waiting at a foster home in Lenexa for me to adopt her. I'm ready now. Roxy needs a new companion. Devin doesn't want to adopt another cat yet. Sound familiar? He didn't want to get Roxy or Gus, but I was able to talk him into it. I am hoping by posting her cute little face all over the place he won't be able to resist. She is already our desktop background. :::sigh:::: who can resist a kitten? Apparently, my husband. :)

A weekend of happies and crappies

2009-06-28T21:44:00.000-07:00

On Saturday Devin found out that he passed his SE 1 exam and will receive his license. Now his title his Devin Riley, PE and he'll get his own stamp and everything. I told him he could stamp me (I really did). I'm so incredibly proud of him. He poured hours upon hours upon hours into studying for this thing (for over a year) and it paid off. He told me that it had a 48% pass rate. Yikes! It was so great to see him get the mail and run inside yelling "MARIE! I PASSED!" I've never seen him this excited about anything. Fun stuff.

The crappy thing is I just returned home from having Gus put down. His health had just deteriorated to a point where it seemed wrong to keep him around. Even though I am so, so sad to think about life without my lovable cat around, I feel so much more at peace because he's not suffering anymore. Gus really was a great cat. He used to come running to the door when we'd come home and lay smack down at our feet so we'd rub his belly. He also used to make himself at home on the laps of all of our guests, leaving a giant wad of hair. He was happiest outside sitting underneath one of our trees (where we'll bury him tomorrow). I am a little worried for Roxy. Gus was her companion. Just last night when he was laying lethargically near my closet, Roxy came over and started diligently cleaning his ears.

The people at the vet's office were incredibly kind and sensitive to me, even though I was bawling like a baby. The doctor who actually administered his shot didn't ask me a bunch of questions or make me feel like a bad person. He just said "I'm sorry" and gently explained what they were going to do. Gus had a lot of fans out there, that's for sure. Even though I've openly favored Roxy through the years, most of our friends and family liked Gus because he truly had the personality of a golden retriever. He'll definitely be missed. I'm sure he'll be waiting for us in heaven (because everyone knows God is a cat person). We love you Gus (Gussy Pie). Our house won't be the same without you.

Don't be an idiot (Lesson # 2,352)

2009-06-25T21:41:00.001-07:00

I would lose my head if it wasn't attached. I probably lose my keys or my cell phone at least twice a day. Anytime I go anywhere you'll hear me say "Deviiiiin have you seen my keys??" He always humors me by trying to help. I guess he's figured out after being with me for ten years that putting them in the same place just isn't going to happen. Want to know where his keys are? Oh that's easy. They're on the dresser in a little dish. It's so great when I lose mine and need to take his in a hurry. I love it! Wouldn't it be great if I could do that?

I'm doing so much better with my cell phone, but only if I have my flowery Vera Bradley bag. If I need to use a different bag (like today) I'm hopeless. I'm a mess. Thankfully my mom was reading Aunt Shel and me excerpts out of Please Understand Me about ESFPs and I feel slightly better knowing these silly habits have been ingrained in me since birth.

We went to the pool with Merah and her girls today and had a great time. We made a quick stop at Hy-vee before heading home. Because I was running late, I did not drink my daily morning cup of coffee and by 1 'o clock I had a KILLER headache. Nausea included. In fact, the nausea was so awful it reminded me of morning sickness and I was sympathetic to all my pregnant friends. I came into the house and dumped all my stuff on the floor, did not argue with Addison when she wanted a muffin and milk for lunch, fed Ainsley and stuck her in her crib. I looked around and couldn't find my phone. I ran outside into the sweltering heat to look for it. Most of the other contents of our house were out in the car, but not the phone. I dumped out the swimming pool bag and it wasn't in there either. By now my head hurt so bad that I was about to pass out, and Ainsley was not happy up in the crib. I brought her downstairs and stuck her in the swing and Addison and I passed out on the couch. I tried to sleep, but I kept stressing out about my phone. I really had no idea where it could be and I just KNEW I left it at the pool or Hy-vee. At around 3:45 I couldn't take it anymore. I woke up both girls, put them back in their carseats, and drove back to the pool, parked the car, walked them both inside. No phone. Got back in the car, drove back to Hy-vee, parked the car again, walked back inside (after praying) to customer service, certain that my phone would be there. No again.

By then I was close to tears. I have a Palm Centro (not a cheap phone) that I just got at Christmas. How was I supposed to explain to Devin that I lost it? How could I muster up the humility? How pissed was he going to be at me? Why the heck did I donate my old phone? Plus my head still hurt really bad.

I drive up to the house feeling defeated, and decide that maybe someone at either the pool or the store will find it later and that I'd try calling tomorrow. When I started picking up the house before Devin got home, there was my phone in all its shiny pink glory sitting on a shelf next to the back door. All of that FOR NOTHING!

I said lots of prayers that God would help me find my phone. I wonder if he was shaking his head and laughing at me for being such a ditz.

Hope that gave you a good laugh too.

Friendliness or Stalkerness?

2009-06-20T09:48:00.001-07:00

I remember faces (and sometimes names). Sometimes this "gift" I have is good and people seem grateful that I remember them. Sometimes it's bad because I can come off like a total stalker. I get into trouble with it a lot working at Baby Gap. For instance, I saw a girl at VBS this week and she looked totally familiar. I couldn't place her. I asked her if she was from LV. Nope. How about K-State? Yes! K-State, but 4 years before me. Hmm.... Then I saw her cute little girl and remembered her from Baby Gap. Well then I feel like I made her come across as someone who shops there too much (which wasn't true). Arrgh. Sometimes I think I should just keep my mouth shut (but I probably won't. I like talking to people too much).

Next area of trouble for me: FACEBOOK.

I'm not too choosy on friends. If I've met you once, I think it's perfectly acceptable to ask to be your friend. In fact, I was looking for Tann electric on facebook to become a fan (they saved us from impending death) and came across the guy who did the electrical work. I did NOT ask him to be my friend, but I sure came close. Anyway, even though I did not ask the electrical guy to be my friend, I have asked people from church in leadership positions to be my friend (even though I have maybe said hi to them in the hall, or even if I haven't even met them). This is all fine and good. We're brothers and sisters in Christ, right? Well it just gets a liiiiiitle bit awkward when I run into them either at church or some other place. I've come across these people and they seriously take a few extra seconds to place me. What do you do? Do you say "hi I'm your friend on facebook. I'm a creep!" or do you say nothing? So far I've gone with option #2 and I don't think it's going to last much longer. Help!

Perhaps I'll stick with just being facebook friends with people I actually know.

I was also tempted to become facebook friends with my high school ex-boyfriend's wife (just out of curiosity), but Leigh Ayn talked me out of that one and became friends with her instead. Good friends do that kind of thing.

Saw a kid wearing this at VBS today...

2009-06-17T11:57:00.001-07:00

It made me laugh.

I'm one of them now

2009-06-12T16:59:00.000-07:00

It's 7 pm and Ainsley is in bed. This seems crazy! 7? That's so early! Addison was always such a night owl and I'm so used to being able to take her out to restaurants, get togethers, even late night New Year's Eve celebrations! Even now, it's a pain to get her to go to bed by 9 pm. I never understood my friends who had to miss out on all the fun stuff because of bedtime. In fact, a bunch of my friends who don't have kids thought Devin and I were fun because we liked to hang out late and would just cart Addison around with us.

::::sigh:::::

Ainsley's different. She gets crabby. Reeeeeealllllllly crabby. Unbearable. I couldn't figure out why she was getting so crabby every single evening right around 7 pm until I talked to my friend Alison from church who said her kids go to bed at 7.
"But I don't want to be one of those moms" I told her (I suffer from foot in mouth disease).
"Well I'm one of those moms, Marie, and it works."

Dang. She's right! Tonight Ainsley started getting fussy around 6:45, so I put her little "Does this diaper make my butt look big?" onesie on, swaddled her up and put her to bed thinking she'd surely throw a huge fit because it's so early. Nope. Didn't cry at all. Went right to sleep. I even went in to check on her and she was smiling in her sleep!

Who knows? Maybe she'll wake up 30 minutes later and scream and I'll delete this whole post, but I'm willing to give it a try if it's what she needs. Just add it to my ongoing "selfish desires I didn't even realize I had until I had kids" list. :)

Eight

2009-06-09T19:53:00.001-07:00

Eight Things I'm Looking Forward To:
1.August 15, when Ainsley will be old enough to go to the gym and I can have a nice break
2. Seeing Keri when she comes to visit soon
3. Seeing Aunt Shel and Mariah in a couple of weeks
4. Addison's 3rd birthday party. She talks about her birthday every day.
5. Seeing Year One. It looks pee-your-pants funny.
6. Going on a bonafied vacation after all this stupid debt is paid off. I'm talking the works: nice hotel, a beach, restaurants, margaritas, you name it, we're doing it!
7. When my dad calls us saying he's found a great job.
8. June 15, when I can re-stock the grocery budget. :) It's down to $18.

Eight Things I Did Yesterday:
1. Bible Study
2. Caribou Coffee ($1 Mondays baby!)
3. Aldi
4. Last minute park getaway with Brenda and our kids
5. Watched the Bachelorette (that Jake is such a cutie)
6. Played cards with Addison
7. Fed Ainsley about 15 million times
8. Is it sad that I can't think of an 8th thing? :)

Eight Things I Wish I Could Do:
1. Play the guitar and the piano
2. Be Tidy. Regardless of how hard I try, thing tend to get messy in a hurry. Especially when I'm cooking. (hey me too Erica!)
4. Drive Devin's car
5. Bake bread like an artisan bread maker
6. Run
7. Go to nursing school
8. Go on a shopping spree

Eight Shows I Watch:
1. The Office
2. Amazing Race
3. Biggest Loser
4. The Bachelorette
5. LOST
6. Max and Ruby
7. Dora
8. Say Yes to the Dress

Eight Favorite Fruits:
1. Blueberries
2. Strawberries
3. mandarin oranges
4. grapes
5. pineapple
6. kiwi
7. peaches
8. cherries

Eight Places I've Lived:
1. Shawnee, KS
2. Manhattan, KS
3. Columbia, MD
4. Leavenworth, KS
5. Heidelberg, Germany
6. The Netherlands
7. Hinesville, GA
8. Charlottesville, VA

Eight Places to Visit:
1. Germany. I am dying to go back to Garmisch and a Christmas Market
2. Hawaii
3. New England
4. Upper NW (Washington, Oregon)
5. Montana, Wyoming and the Dakotas
6. Ireland again
7. Where Amanda lives (Amish land)
8. Southern California
(9.) Spring Canyon (I miss it there)